I wonder why . . .
…every single piece you need for a wedding is three times more expensive than usual.
Have you ever heard of wedding bubbles? These bubbles are normal bubbles, the difference is that they come in form of a wedding cake for example AND three times smaller than the normal ones but cost the triple. Are people honestly that stupid to buy them? Otherwise I have no explanation why they still exist. The same for a cake. As soon as you mention the word wedding prices going upwards – but isn’t the cake made of the same ingredients as any other cake on this earth?
A really nice tailored and exclusive evening or even ball gown is less than the half of a wedding dress. Where’s the big difference? Apart from the color the work should be the same, shouldn’t it?
To save at least quite a bit of money we decided to do a bit of ‘DIY’ work ourselves.
We did for instance the invites. It took me ages and fingers full of glue but in the end it was something completely unique.
Also the placeholders\seatcards – I didn’t like the idea of buying general ones and just put the names on it. As the wedding took place in my parents’ garden and it’s all a bit vintage I bought small black plates like little chalkboards and wrote the guest names in silver on them.
Don’t hesitate to do things yourself as it seems more complicated as it will be and you give your wedding your stamp.
Attached a few pictures of DIY things from our wedding.
Here’s just a bit of what I prepared up to now for our upcoming wedding.
Insanity or just a bride to be?
Did you ever plan a wedding?
My wedding ticker on the web is telling me “31 days to go”. And yes, you got it, I have a wedding ticker. Is that still me?!?
I tried to look at myself and what I’m up to during these days and realized that I am one of these brides I was joking about before. If you would have asked me how to marry the clear answer was in the same second “just a tiny formal celebration and then off to honeymoon”. Where is this woman now?
I catch myself being more on google and wedding web pages than sleeping.
And I start to make these noises. You know, these bride noises when she’s looking at something soooo cute, like “Aaaaaah” and “Ooooooh”, which means “I need that too!”
My husband to be is already asking me almost daily if we are still within the budget. Me, the one who tried to save where possible, seeing myself thinking about wedding bubbles where the price is three times higher than for normal ones.
Is that phenomenon normal or is it just me going insane?
But at least I’m still able to judge properly and I don’t know how exactly but yes, I kept the budget (so far).
31 days and while the day is getting closer I seem to relax mainly. Mainly because my subconsciousness seems to have another sight. A few days ago I woke up and knew that I dreamt of an awful wedding but luckily I wasn’t able to recall details.
As nice and perfect as a wedding should be, it’s a bit scary too, isn’t it? It’s not that I have doubts, not at all. It’s more than sure that I will say “Yes, I do!”, I mean the whole day. Will it be like we want it to be? Do we have higher expectations than what’s possible? And how will I survive my speech? Yes, the bride’s speech. Which is unusual, I know, but I said I will do it and now I have to. No way back. Just because I did it more than often in my job doesn’t mean I will get a word out on my wedding day – this was my personal misjudging. Here we go, the bride will look like a zombie while crying and trying to finish a sentence in front of all. I have to rehearse before but it will never reflect the situation…lets hope I’m doing it at least with not too many tears and interruptions.
For the time being I’m just happy that almost everything is prepared and planned so I have around 20 days to calm down. How to do that best? Any tips – they are more than welcome.
Which wedding traditions do we want on our wedding day and what is completely not our style?
There are so many typical things and some are even “expected” by guests but what we decided is to make our day as comfortable for us as we want it.
So here’s a list of traditions we will/may have:
– the husband is not allowed to see the bridal gown before the wedding day! That’s for sure.
– the wedding kiss – maybe even double as my husband could kiss my forehead also as this is more convenient to him.
– something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue.
– the husband has to be at the registry office or the place where the wedding will take place before the bride arrives. My dad will guide me into the room.
– a little girl which will bring the wedding bands to the couple
– flower petals, this is a maybe as we have to check first if it is allowed.
– cutting the wedding cake
– witnesses, even if they aren’t officially needed nowadays. They will be his uncle and my dad. Quite nice as we have a Libyan tradition inserted where both, bride and groom, have an older married man as witness.
– gifts for the bride’s parents, sisters and brothers from the groom and vice versa (means from the bride to the groom’s family)
– to feed each other as sign of the caring for each other. It can be milk, dates or the first piece of the wedding cake.
– carry the wife over the threshold.
– a morning giving
What we for sure don’t want:
– spending the night before the wedding apart.
– hen night
– kidnapping the bride
– a penny in the shoe, I will wear sandals
– wedding newspaper
– veil dance
The list may grow on on both sides, I have the feeling as if we are still at the beginning of our planning although many things are prepared or planned already.
If you have nice ideas please which aren’t listed here please share them – at least the bride can never get enough hints and tips on what’s possible…
Greetings from the bride to be, Miss Faith
I always said I’m not the typical woman when it comes to a wedding. Never dreamt of being a princess for one day. And then I detect myself in front of thousands of dresses to like some which fit totally in the picture of a princess.
Was that the flood of pictures or what was it? At least I’m glad that I realized it myself before doing the final choice. What could be worse than walking down the aisle in a dress which let everyone stare at me in disbelief – murmuring “where’s she, that couldn’t be her?” or “what drugs is she taking recently?”.
But even with a clear mind I still had the problem of ‘being a woman’. How should we choose one when there are so many nice styles?
I reduced it a bit by buying the shoes and the bag before the dress which is limiting the dress style itself a bit and fortunately NO princess dress is going along with my shoes!
So what to do now? Once bought its yours, and if alterations have been made its even more yours.
Here the realistic Miss Faith started to think – as realistic as a bride to be – I have to add this as brides are never 100% realistic.
We will celebrate in a garden which means long trains don’t make sense as well as dresses who are too expensive. Who wants the bride to stay in the house the whole day because she’s too scared that she may have grass ruining her dress?
Our wedding should be kind of laid-back, summer, garden, loved ones around us, a big summer barbecue with a chocolate fountain as dessert. Kids running around maybe with ice cream when it’s hot in August.
The realistic bride decided now to order a dress from China, the prices are more than OK, reviews of the dresses more than Ok and I don’t have to worry in the end if something is happening to my dress.
The only thing I have to worry about is how long it will take until its here and if its fitting properly.
And here comes the “being a woman” Miss Faith – to be on the safe side I just ordered two different dresses from two different sellers and the total price is more than good so I won’t have to worry about little chocolate hands passing by my dress or pieces of cake falling in my lap.
I like both styles so much that I’m not able right now to decide which one it will be in the end and I would love to post picture here to hear your opinions but the groom knows the blog and he is not allowed to get a clue of what I may wear!
Now it’s time to keep fingers crossed until they hopefully arrive and I can make the final decision.
The story will continue…
Keep the faith – you only win if you take a risk sometimes.
The Wedding Wish Jar
I read a few weeks ago about a nice idea for the wedding party.
The wedding wish jar, comes from the US, and is a glass where guests put little notes in on which they pin down wishes, tips, nice words for the newlyweds.
We are not connected to the US at all but I want this jar on my wedding as I like the idea.
It’s even nice to say we take it with us on honeymoon afterwards to read in peace what our guests wrote and recap like this the happiness from our wedding day.
That’s our wedding wish jar, which hopefully soon is filled with lots of notes.
Faithfully, the wedding Miss maniac bride Faith
My intention was to write posts during my days off around Easter and what happened?
Google seems to be my best friend nowadays and I spent time on thousands of bridal dress pages, wedding tradition pages, wedding planning pages, wedding…pages.
Here comes the wedding maniac – that’s the new nick name my husband to be gave me shortly.
But that’s how women are, isn’t it. I would be scared if I’m not planning and checking and organizing and and and – I told him he has to appreciate it as a sign of my love for him and to have the day planned as best as possible 😉
I promise to try my best and write ‘updates’ from time to time.
Faithfully, Wedding maniac formerly Miss Faith
A wedding is exciting but what do you think a binational wedding is? I didn’t thought that it’s so hard to plan as you need to keep in mind the timeframe.
Biggest problem for us will be the final date.
As long as all personal documents from my future husband are under review we just can stay calm and wait for a reply. This reply is essential for the further planning as it could be good, means everything is ok and we can go ahead and schedule a date, but it could also be that we have to bring something additional and the whole package has to be send in again for a review.
As not even one of these papers has to be older than six month we are facing a tight schedule.
What does it mean exactly? It means we have to plan a whole wedding within a half year but we won’t be sure until around eight weeks before the wedding if it could really take place or if we have to start the whole process again.
Did someone ever planned a wedding within six month? I think that’s already a challenge but what about eight weeks?
The main problem is that we cannot invite someone more than eight weeks before as we will not have a date. And who will be able to confirm his or her attendance without exact dates?
Therefore we have no clue how many guests we will have, how much food we need or which location will fit.
A wedding planner will quit his job at this stage as its almost impossible to book a location within eight weeks unless you don’t care about how it looks like. I do care! The last I want for my wedding is a crappy location. To get out of this challenge we said we will have a small intimate celebration with just family and best friends around so that all will fit in the garden of my parents house.
This plan was nice until some became aware of our upcoming wedding.
The draft guest list went from around twenty five to fourth five within a couple of weeks.
It seems as if our loved ones are sure they will be able to attend without knowing a date, which is causing us the next problem. My parents garden is really so nice but it’s not a park!
Where to start and where to stop now? I have no idea, my fiancé will be here with me in a few days and I can’t wait to discuss all these things with him face to face instead of talking on Skype with interrupted connections from time to time.
Until then I try to stay calm and stop thinking too much. Everything happens for a reason and I believe in it even when reality let me struggle from time to time. As long as I can think it was fine in the end.
Faithfully, Miss Faith
What else happened during the past weeks?
There is so much to write about from the past weeks besides the engagement, the family visits and our islamic wedding that I don’t even know where to start.
Shortly after my love arrived from Libya he proposed to me and made me the happiest person ever. But after a proposal the planning starts and this is honestly not that easy. Two cultures, two countries, Europe and North Africa, Christian and Muslim, woohoo, lots to keep in mind and focus on. But some wise man one day said ‘love can handle everything’ so here we go on our journey to be finally husband and wife. For the legal part the first step was to ask just for informations about a wedding in Germany. To make it easy we choose the registry office in my birth town. It’s a small city and you don’t have to wait ages until they have a date for you but it quickly turned out that we have to check it in Munich as I’m officially registered there. The first sentence almost before the woman working there said hallo was – you have to pay before we start to review the fact sheet for a binational wedding. What a start, the first money already spent before we know anything. Next was that she was approaching my fiancé in German. And what a surprise, his German is not enough to consent to anything legal so even if he’s speaking clearly English and also is trusting my translations we have to bring a certified translator when we want to apply for the wedding. As if that’s not enough we got a full list of documents he has to bring translated and certified in Germany! It is not sufficient if the translation and certification was done in Libya and the German embassy there, no, we have to authorize a German agency. Sure we have because it is more expensive to do it here and my feeling is that the registry office is supporting local agencies but that’s just my thinking…
If we have all documents in place and applied for the wedding the documents will be checked at several departments. This hopefully won’t take too long as most documents will expire after six months, they cannot be older than that, otherwise we have to arrange again the whole paper stuff. If they agree within these 6 months, then the registry office in Munich will send everything to the small registry office of my home town and we can schedule a date with them.
This would be perfect as it is smaller, more intimate, located in a small park instead of a grey building and most important, we would have our families around. Belgium is not too far away from my parents, so his uncle could be there as well as my family.
Let’s keep our fingers crossed that it will work without major problems and we soon are also legally husband and wife!
Keep the faith and never lose hope!
My Islamic wedding
What is that? Hadn’t I wrote just a few days ago that I’m so happy because I’m engaged? And now already a married wife, how quick is that?
It’s true, I married my fiancé, shortly after our return from the family visits but not in the way that we are now legally bonded husband and wife, we married in the Islamic way which is not legal in Germany.
Why did we do it?
The story started when I met him as I knew from the very first beginning that he is a Muslim and not only by birth, he’s living it. That doesn’t mean that he’s the super religious person as many think when hearing Muslim, but he’s sticking to his religion and believes in it by heart.
To go directly against preoccupied people, no, I’m not married to an extremist, Al Kaida member or self suicide Muslim, I’m married to a faithful person and to the greatest husband ever for me. And another no, he’s not putting pressure on me in any way, I am still free and still without religion.
I’m German and I know also persons around me who are Christians by heart and who believes in their religion just in a natural way, so nothing to even talk about but when it comes to Muslims you always have to justify and clarify and explain just because of the stupid extreme persons showing off something which has in my point of view nothing to do with religion. Sorry, I interrupted myself but that’s something I wanted to add.
So we did it in the Islamic way as it was important for my fiancé. You can consider it like kind of blessing. Similar to what Christians do when they went to a church. Gods mercy through the prayer and advise from an imam.
Ok, it wasn’t that easy to find an imam because I thought in first place we should choose a mosque with Arabic background but it was quickly proofed to be the wrong decision. I don’t know how often we went there in total and to how many persons we spoke but the bottom line was that a twenty something young so called imam started a speech about why he cannot do the wedding. He went so far to almost calling me ‘unpurified’, I don’t even want to write the words I heard unsaid about what he was thinking about me. My reaction was purely to say: honey, lets go, I don’t need to listen to someone like him, judging me without even being able to look at me while talking. This “imam” was looking at the wall behind me while trying to convince me that I have to regret everything I did in my life. I do not regret anything! I had good times and bad times and precious memories and memories which are not sunny and happy but in the end all this made me the person I am today. The person my fiancé fell in love with. Just later a sentence came to my mind which would have fitted: let him who is without sin cast the first stone. And I don’t even think that I have sins – I just lived, I never hurted anyone on purpose or lied about important things, I haven’t killed or stolen my neighbors husband, and so on, I just lived my life for the last thirty-five years and tried to be a good person along the way.
This is not worth talking about because we drove off and my fiancé was as angry as me.
Soon afterwards we found a small mosque nearby where people were almost enthusiastic to find the imam for us. Two old men were almost running stairs up and down to locate him for us.
A bit worried from the first experience I was waiting and then he asked us to come into his rooms.
A white haired old man with, which gave me a good feeling, a kind and calm expression on his face. The two others joined us as during an Islamic wedding you need two witnesses. It turned out to be good as the imam was only talking arabic and Turkish, so the witnesses were also my translators.
The imam was explaining what he will do, what’s the sense of agreeing on a wedding, that in their tradition a sum for the wife has to be written down and agreed on in case of the husband leaving the wife. What for sure is not a bad thing but what we – inshallah – will never need. He was so kind and asked me upfront if it would be OK for me to cover my hair for the celebration. I had a zebra scarf around my neck, maybe not the kind of cover he thought, and did it as even if I’m without a religion I have a deep respect before religious persons. Not only for the imam, also for priests, rabbis, whatever there is on the world, as long as they treat me with respect I respect them too. And he was respectful and even kind of funny as the wife has to agree three times that she’s willing to take the man as her husband and he told me that I have to say “OK” three times. He said OK, OK, OK and I repeated it.
The first time I have ever heard that as an agreement for a wedding, I know the “Yes, I do” but OK was not on my mind before. He said the prayer together with my newlywed husband and the witnesses and afterwards the three old men were congratulating us and wishing us all the best and a happy future together. The witness gave us our wedding documents and they led us out of the mosque. There we were, newlyweds, on a snowy Sunday afternoon in the middle of Munich and what should I say, I’m so happy that we did it.
It’s kind of weird as I never thought that it will change something for me but it is like the engagement day, when you don’t expect anything you will discover in the end, that these steps are changing your life. I’m called wife now from my husband and even if the legal wedding is more important for me as I will take on his last name on that day I feel like his wife already and am talking about my husband. And it has shown me another thing in life, be open-minded, don’t cut precious moments like this out of your life because you are pre-occupied. You never know how it would be unless you do it.
Keep the faith, it hasn’t to be religious but it could, just the way you feel comfortable with is the right one.
And I had a “wedding” piece of cake afterwards 😉
We four met at Thessaloniki airport and from first sight it was clear that we like each other and will make the best out of this short stay.
The couple was awaiting us at the hotel reception to give us the time schedule for the wedding days and they were so lovely. Since a long time a couple I met which was truly meant to be together. For the first night we just picked a small local restaurant and ordered a mix of different local dishes – try it if you ever go to Greece – it was delicious and not our last visit to a local restaurant. For the next evening the eve-of-the-wedding-party was planned where I’m not entirely sure if it was German or Greek or both’s traditions. It was a mix of cultures with the typical throwing crockery but also live music to dance the sirtaki, greek barbecue and German music, people talking without knowing the same language, an amazing evening or night to remember. But it was only the start. The big wedding was on the next day and fortunately not starting in the morning as we all were a bit sleepy. After a long and big breakfast the women were getting their hair done by an extra ordered stylist whereas most of the men went for a nap on the beach.
When all were ready we drove to a small Greek-orthodox church in the middle of a tiny village. It was so small that not even all guests were able to stay inside during the ceremony but that was handled easily. Doors just left open and from outside you still heard partly how the ceremony was conducted. But before we all including the stylish groom were waiting for the bride to arrive. The stylish groom? He was wearing a shiny light blue suit with a solver belt and silver shoes. Sounds weird but it was first suiting him and second to know he bet with the bride to surprise her with an unnormal outfit and she wasn’t believing him. So the moment they met in front of the church was lots of laughter and also lots of love flowing between them. The ceremony itself was held in Greek but was nice to watch. After that lots of rice was “raining” on the newlyweds which is still allowed there. I learned that its forbidden in Germany because the doves are eating too much of it and then kind of explode afterwards. And then the party started. You an say about Greek people what you like but one thing they absolutely can is celebrating. Even the oldest stayed until late at night and danced the Sirtaki. I can’t remember when I danced the last time a whole night long but this night was great. And after all the different courses of the menu also a good thing, some may take Ouzo as digestives, I prefer the Sirtaki. Many ended up after lots of ouzo and dancing to go for a swim in the early still dark morning hours which amused the rest of us. We went to bed around five in the morning which was a clear sign that the wedding was a full success not only for the bride and groom but also for the guests.
The few days we stayed afterwards were great relaxation and a bit of visiting heritage sites in Greece. I still have a reminder in my flat from this wedding as the bride was giving me one of a few olive branch crowns. She explained that her task is to give them to the persons she wants to get a special portion of luck in future and even if we met just a few days before she decided that I’m one of them. I was honored and this crown has now a place in flat, I keep it there as a reminder of this wonderful stay. Amazon.de Widgets
Thanks to Anna and Dino!