Being able to spend time alone…
…is so very important. A full schedule every day of the week just because you are not able to cope with yourself cannot be healthy. It’s essential to know how to spend time alone and to cherish these times. Regardless of sitting on the couch and watch weird things on TV or reading a good book, just being alone shows us that we are we and only if we can be happy with ourselves we will be able to make others happy. I love it from time to time to do only things for me and these things can be thousands of different situations. Reading while eating lots of chocolate, listening to music on an open window with the sun on my face, not talking, not even picking up the phone for two hours. Your friends will still be there after three hours when you are in the mood to call them back.
Thinking about…documentaries… Documentaries….
Why are the most interesting ones on air in the middle of the night?
Whenever I switch on my TV there’s trash and even if they call the trash documentary because its about a special topic like sextoys, germans dating women in Eastern Europe or another new fashionable building in Dubai, it all remains trash from my point of view. But what happens if I just roughly switch through the channels before I intended to go and sleep?
Yes, the real documentary starts.
Behind the scenes information about workers of the United Nations, journalists traveling through Mali to uncover what’s going on with the Tuaregs there, and so on.
Topics which are not only interesting, they can also teach us to be more open minded instead of living in our small world with our small problems.
I’m keen to learn as much as possible about the whole world, see different cultures, lifestyles and traditions but it’s hard to find it on TV.
Am I so unique or what’s the reason for this? At least travel documentaries should be something which is interesting for the majority, shouldn’t it. I can and will not believe that most persons live in such a small restricted world and are happy with what they can reach within a few hours. There’s so much to discover on earth, so why should I limit myself and just stay where I am for my entire life. Isn’t that boring?
I honestly think if more would be interested in learning this world would be a bit more open to others. As long as you don’t want to learn why people are doing something you will never be able to understand. It’s easy to judge from an outside position but stepping into depths is teaching you why traditions, cultures or habits are existent and how they influence whole countries or regions.
Stay open and faithful,
Now that my “husband / fiancé / husband to be” is here with me I try my best to have as much leisure time as possible for us. We decided that I will not take too many vacation days during his stay as we for sure need them. A few for a short trip maybe in May or June and most of them for our planned wedding and honeymoon in late summer.
Now I’m struggling between work, being a good wife and enjoying the precious time we have together.
Who ever said life is easy has never tried to change his old behaviors. Whenever I’m alone I don’t care too much after a long working day on how to spend the evening. I’ll find something to eat in front of TV and that’s it. Being together now means I change these habits as I want to have a nice proper dinner and a cosy relaxed evening.
Why am I writing just now you may think – I just sit on the couch next to my husband who is focussing completely on a movie, rarely noticing if I say something 😉
Men and action movies, I watch them only if we made a compromise like today action but therefore tomorrow comedy or romance…so tomorrow it’s my turn to focus on a movie.
He deserves his time out really as we have been on the first big family gathering last weekend and he was in the focus of almost my whole family. Twenty five persons all keen to meet my precious one. This weekend will be just ours and the plan is to do nothing except of eating, snuggling up, watching movies and having a cosy time. Leisure time as its best.
This year (or to be correct, last years – 2012) I spent Xmas again with my family. The last years we hadn’t had a Xmas only with our inner circle family which means mum, dad, my sister and me. Sometimes it was me and my parents when my sister was with her boyfriend, or it was my sister and my parents while I stayed in Munich. This year all were happy to be together again. For me it was also a time to get some rest while doing nothing. Doing nothing is something I’m absolutely bad at. As long as I’m home I will find something which has to be done instead of just snuggling up on the couch and read a book or watch a movie. This is different at my parents as I don’t have to clean the house or do the washing. I was already looking forward to watch all the Xmas fairy tales on TV, feeling like a child again, no problems, no tasks.
It turned out that I really had a few relaxing days. There was lots of family gathering with aunts and uncles and their families but no stress during my stay. A bit of shopping, coffee with old friends, delicious food and lots of sleep.
Our Xmas tree was a cute small one this year and on twenty fourth we celebrated in the typical German way with potato salad and sausage in the evening, unwrapping the presents and family games for the rest of the evening. This year it was “rummikub” and I’m really keen to win those games. I started good but was the loser in the end – haha. But a saying here says if you aren’t lucky in gambling you are lucky with love. Keeping my love is worth losing the games!
On twenty fifth the traditional Xmas goose was prepared for lunch. If you never tried a goose you miss something, it’s so lovely!
And the last official Xmas day, the twenty sixth, which is also the birthday of one of my aunts we stayed in her house for birthday cake and coffee in the afternoon. All my cousins around and lots of chatting and laughing.
For New Year’s Eve I planned nothing, I just stayed at my friend and we had a nice dinner, lots of talking and TV and watched the fireworks from her balcony.
But like always, as soon as you feel a bit relaxed and would like to relax a bit more it’s time to get back to work. The same for me, directly on the first of January I had to drive back home to start working the next day.
The good thing about it is, that it was only one more month left until I can close my arms around my fiancé again, inshallah. As he told me before, the time will pass quickly.
I hope all of you had a nice holiday and a happy start in 2013.
I have no New Years resolutions but hopefully this year will be exciting with all our plans ahead.
Faithfully, Miss Faith!
How busy can a person be – not being able to write although writing is one of my favorites during leisure time.
I have to educate myself once again. Being busy is something we often pretend to be although in most cases it is kind of not structuring our life and not taking enough time for the things we love.
It’s almost 2013 and I normally should have had enough time during the last days to just sit down and do things I want to do. Instead of doing it I snuggled up in front of the TV and watched all the Christmas fairy tales – maybe that was what I needed but my book was almost looking at me annoyed and my mind told me that it’s wasted time as I didn’t do anything creative or productive.
TV is really something which is bringing me away from stuff I could do better during that time. Nevertheless – I found the way back to write at least today. This is what I mean with educating myself, I should make a habit like taking one hour per day I concentrate on books and writing, as it should become daily routine after a while if I stick to it. On the other hand there’s a small problem, do I really want it to be routine? No, and I say no because for me routine and creativity or relaxing time has nothing in common. Maybe it’s just my impression but if I hear the word routine I’m thinking about things we have to do, things I do without thinking too much, cleaning is routine, washing is or asking the trash out, but nothing like writing thoughts down. My thoughts change as does my enthusiasm to write about something. There are times when I love todo it but there are also times when I cannot calm down as I know that some things need to be finalized before I have the quiet surrounding to let my thought flow.
Bottom line – I was too busy.
Shortly after my fiancé left Germany for work I was buried with work to finish before driving to my parents for the Christmas celebrations.
Here I am now, sitting in my old children’s room, and finally writing again.
There happened so much during the past months that I started several posts already but it’s too confusing to bring one to an end right now. I can’t wait to get them finalized and posted and this is another point. Am I busy now with writing although I have no idea if people like what I’m writing or not – I will not start to stress myself more than needed. In the end I’m believing that everyone who’s thinking a bit in the same way I do understands how it is and also understands that my blog is a real life persons blog. Life never goes as you plan it and it is ok – otherwise it would be boring, wouldn’t it?
Some drafts are already written and I hope to find the right time and place during the next days and weeks to tell my story, to write about how it is now, being engaged although miles apart, being entirely happy although missing is hard, all the stories I want to write and give them a second thought, remember these times as they were so precious and moving forward into an exciting future.
You see, I need to sort my thought because otherwise no one would understand what I’m writing about, my mind is full of so many impressions.
I don’t know if you ever tried it but when I first thought about meditation I bought a small book which told on its cover that you learn quickly how to meditate.
I read it and that’s it. No inspiration, no guiding, no motivation for me at all.
I put it aside but the thought about needing something to stop my mind running in circles was still present. I took my iPad and downloaded some free apps with meditations to listen to and here I started.
Just using the earplugs and listening to it is the easiest way to start instead of reading lots of instructions. What happened for several times is that I just fell asleep after a while but that was fine for me. The women telling me what to do, how to breath, what to focus on, etc. has such a calm voice and in combination with quiet background music it’s really inviting you to have a nap. But again I wasn’t doing it regularly as I planned and I’m still not found a rhythm for myself. What’s the worst about it is that I see myself in front of stupid stuff on TV telling myself that this is relaxing time although I know I’m totally wrong. To change a manifested behavior is not as easy as I thought in first place. So if anyone has tips and tricks on how to change it please let me know. One thing I realized is that even the few nights were helping me getting rid of TV in my bedroom which is already a good thing. I turned back to what I was used to and am reading again. Maybe I’m expecting too much from myself which also isn’t unusual for a perfectionist. And in the end, the big question, what is meditation? Can’t it be a state of just doing something else instead of running in circles on your mind? If yes than reading already would be kind of meditation as its easing. During the time I read I focus on the story and not about problems, work, what to do next, what still isn’t finalized, and and and…
If I start thinking too much I take the earplugs and its calming me down. This will not be the end of this journey as I honestly want to get rid of stupid behavior like staying up too long without a sense but I think I have to accept and also to appreciate that the first steps are already gone, otherwise I wouldn’t be able to write about it. Sometimes you only realize small efforts if you see them written in front of you.
Maybe this blog is also kind of mediation for me as I’m focusing only on one single topic each time and black out the rest going on around and inside me.
I found the following definition and while reading it I was affirming to myself that I’m not too wrong in what I’m doing.
“Meditation is the act of remaining in a silent and calm state for a period of time, as part of a religious training, or so that you are more able to deal with the problems of everyday life.”
And another conclusion after I read is – am I doing it to match the definition or to feel better afterwards? Are we running to much after how we should be and how things are defined from the outside instead of focussing on what we like and feel comfortable with? But that’s another topic.
Keep the faith in your life and most important, keep it within you!