My window into a new life
You see the window on this picture, that’s “my” window, it was taken while we were on our first holidays on Cyprus.
My husband gave me the sight back – I was blind, blind in regards to life.
Too many struggles, never ending thoughts, resignation, running in circles, I simply lost the view towards my own future. Life was mainly dark and silent and then he stepped all of a sudden into my life and was so optimistic.
Life is not easy but we should live it as whatever is meant to happen will happen – his faith. We are both faithful persons but in complete different meanings.
What counts is the outcome – being able to love yourself, listen to your heart, trust others, look forward instead of living in the past.
The past is not our life anymore so we need to let it go.
This window is special as it was in an old castle and the way up scared me, always the abyss in sight and for me far too close to the car.
He reassured me, nothing will happen.
He was wrong – something happened – within me!
I trusted because he was confident to take us up there safe.
I looked forward to discover the ruins.
I enjoyed this amazing view with his arms around me, safe and sheltered.
And most important – I was absolutely sure that this view will change my life, this view we enjoyed together, the old ruins we discovered but then left behind like our past.
Sometimes you need to fall, but there will always be one person helping you getting back on track if you struggle and are scared of making it on your own.
I was on the edge of my own darkness, I crawled up slowly throughout the year before these holidays and I have to thank him for dragging me out there before I may fall in again.
This last piece of the way was what stopped me. Maybe because I had no aim to walk towards to.
Love is a great power in both ways, the good and the bad.
Today I can say I found the good, the one that is real and the one where you are loved just the way you are.
Our summer wedding in the garden – part VI
Next on the list was cutting the wedding cake. Our imperfect Pisa wedding cake, as this cake decided over night to drop to one side. My sister and me were doing it the day before and the plan was to give it the final finish the next day but when I opened the fridge in the morning I saw an uneven cake. We fixed it a bit an then decided not to add more as it may fall completely to one side. Nevertheless, the cutting worked without ruining it and it tasted wonderful.
Everybody was now completely relaxed after the ceremony. There was music playing in the garden and plenty of people were enjoying chatting and eating and enjoying the day. We took the opportunity to walk around and talk to everyone, sit down here and there and capture every moment while always looking out for each other and smile happily. We weren’t able to take our eyes off each other. After a while friends of my sister arrived to prepare the summer barbecue we planned as dinner. They were more than professional as almost invisible and did a great job.
We’ve got lots of wonderful feedback for the variety of the dinner and especially for the quality and taste which is also a thanks to our barbecue masters. We prepared everything the other day but only if you know how to prepare it on the fire it will end up perfect.
Our dessert was a big buffet of fresh fruits with a double chocolate fountain on top and it seems as if what one of the highlights for many. They were gathering around it as if there’s no tomorrow.
Our summer wedding in the garden – part V
My best friend came and told me embarrassed that she forgot to hand out the happy tears handkerchiefs but that she gave them now to all guests and that was exactly the right thing.
There were no tears during the ceremony but after we arrived we started again music – Van Morrison with these are the days – and I started my bridal speech.
Standing next to my husband in front of all of my family and friends I felt exited, emotional, happy – all at once. I had so much on my notes but ended up talking freely instead of reading what I wrote down. Welcoming all was the easiest part but when I started to talk to my parents and about his parents it was the moment when tears started to run and handkerchiefs were needed. My sister came quickly to give me a handkerchief as well and after all was said we’ve got applause from all.
My husband told me later that evening that it was one of the most appreciated things I did that day and that he never expected me to mention his parents as well as I unfortunately never met them.
But I knew how important they are for him and they are as well for me as they are the reason for him being alive and being now my husband.
How to be a good couple?
A good partner doesn’t make a good couple.
Two persons are able to become one but it’s work!
What I realize every now and then is that we both need to look in the same direction, at least for the main parts of our life together.
Sure we will always be two unique persons and we don’t need to have the same hobbies but we should have to have the same goal – growing old and wrinkle together.
You don’t see too many good couples although they surely exist and the main reason is that they act normal. They don’t talk about it in either way, good or bad, they do live.
Comparing yourself with other couples is the start to ruin your relationship as we are talking about humans, what’s right for someone hasn’t be the right choice or way of life for someone else.
The most important as a couple is to be happy with one another, not with people outside, not with family members or with whoever wants to step in.
A relationship is a couple thing, it hasn’t to be a public topic on how it should be.
I even think that it would be boring for people outside to listen to couple stories, discussion, or fights about their relationship as these moments are intimate, unique and they only belong to these two persons.
If you two go along like you want a relationship to be then it’s perfect!
Stay loving your life,
Sure it’s not the best option but to be honest, it’s not that complicated. I wasn’t sure if it will work out when I was thinking about long distance relationships in the past. The present shows me that it does. But why is it working? Because of the persons themselves. If you are jealous beyond words you will have a big problem as well as when you have difficulties with trust. If you are loving and trusting from the bottom of your heart and if you are truthful and faithful, maybe even trusting that it was meant to be this way, then the love is growing more than in a day to day relationship, at least from my point of view.
Within a shorter timeframe you are knowing the other person just because you talk. Talking is essential for relationships and while being apart, what else could you do than talk? No one wants to stay quiet on the phone, on chats or on Skype, if that would be the case it cannot work. We miss each other each day and would be happy to stay together but as long as this is not possible we have to make the best out of it.
Another good thing about missing someone is that you will be even more happy when you finally are back together. Like falling in love over and over again whenever you have the chance to be together.
I’m sure that the time is limited as when it comes to planning a life together, a family and a future there must be a place called home. But until then we keep our spirits high, make the best out of each situation we have to faith and trust that there is a way for us together in the same place one day.
Life has no rules – we have to face everything as a challenge and believe that it will work.
I haven’t been in here for quite a while as my fiancé was in Germany and we tried to catch every second to be together. The are so many ‘updates’ to write about and I have to sort it out during the next days. Time is running as always, he was just her and is now already back in Libya at work. Also the year is ending soon and this means lots to do until I can relax over the Xmas days.
There are only less than two weeks left until I go to my parents for the Xmas celebrations and visit my best friend for New Year’s Eve. Unbelievable how quick one year is over when you are happy.
Wen starting to write this I realize that I missed it but as the electrician will be ringing my bell really early tomorrow morning even now I have to hurry and catch some sleep.
Stay tuned as there will be lots of news I want to write about, how is it to introduce a fiancé to parents, how is it to meet his family, how to marry in a mosque, will a marriage in Germany be as possible as we thought, and we already thought that its not that easy, and so on.
Bye for now & keep the faith!
Waiting for the day…
It’s near now, the day my fiance will finally be with me again, and what am I doing?
Starting to clean my flat but not in a normal way, no, from the deepest places up to what is visible.
Why am I doing it? Simple explanation, I just want to focus on what’s important during his stay and not thinking about stupid cleaning or sorting out or whatever during this precious time.
And besides I do this normally every two or three years but nowadays it’s something special.
One wardrobe is almost empty for him to store his clothes. Nothing would be more stupid than living out of a suitcase for one month and I want him to have the feeling to be at home and not feeling like a guest.
The same for my bathroom which is normally crowded with my bottles and creams and make up, now it’s pure and clean and free space for men’s stuff (which isn’t that much compared to women’s).
The living room is as cosy as it could be because it will be wintertime and it’s already getting colder each day. A place to snuggle up in warm light and relax, that’s how I like it and how it always has been but now it becomes a special meaning. We will spend our time here together once again and I can’t wait for the days to pass by until its reality.
These weeks will be exciting as we will meet parts of the family, mine and his, so the plan is to drive there at the beginning of his stay so that we end up with lots of time afterwards just for the two of us.
It’s interesting to start something new with the unique feeling of having found the missing piece in life.
Sure, as adults, there have been relationships in the past but if you then found someone where it feels so right just from the very first beginning it’s something special. It’s hard to explain but I already thought I found it and was proven wrong afterwards and now it’s so different.
Different in the best meaning as I cannot see one single piece which could separate us. This is something I never had before, the feeling of being completely complete with this man on my side even when it seems for outsiders not that easy – living thousands of miles apart, out of different cultures, that cannot be easy.
I can assure you it is!
If you love each other as basis and then discover the same humor, the same sense of what life should be like for the two of you, the same opinions about values, family, even the same taste in many things, then you are able to make it. Even if I’m completely stressed and tired after a long working day I just need to hear his voice shortly and calm down because I know that this is more important than anything else.
Relationships are precious and not only the one to your wife/husband, boyfriend/girlfriend, partner or fiancé.
Life is built on relationships with every kind of human being as these are the people around you who should be there for you whatever life is going to give you.
People who bring you down, make you sad, are envying you or putting stones on your way are the wrong ones, this is also something to sort out. I did it a few months ago and that was the right decision.
Surround yourself with honest persons!
It’s early for me to write all these sentences but I am absolutely doubtless. Which doesn’t mean that we won’t face difficulties but I’m sure we will go towards each other when facing them to find the middle way instead of running apart.
No one said life is easy so why should we give up on something we finally found so easily?
It will be an absolutely exciting time, my family can’t wait almost like me to meet the new family member and my mom is already caring as if her own son is coming home, asking me every now and then what to cook for the first evening and buying warm bedclothes so that he is not freezing in winter time.
And his family will be another adventure for me. He has an uncle in Belgium who moved there a long time ago, also married to a European, and I like to listen to their stories on how they did it. They still seem to be happy together and this is what we want for our future.
So you see, there are many things more important than cleaning up and when the most is done before he arrives I just can focus on the main parts in life.
Another effect is that I start to sit on my couch more relaxed when I know that I have nothing else to do instead of enjoying quality time.
It’s freeing my mind and soul and is giving me a certain kind of serenity.
Not faithless – no, full of faith!