than rolling out the mat
This will be another blog post.
Meanwhile while I am writing that one I would like to know from you:
What means Yoga for you?
I look forward to all your answers <3∞
That sounds beyond selfish, doesn’t it?
I just flipped a card of self love this morning and it said something similar to the headline – plus that only of you feel good yourself you will be a good companion for others, and that’s exactly the point.
Being my own priority may sound weird, I completely agree on it. We all want to be easy going, we want to be loving and caring persons, persons who are fun to be around, all of it sounds great and it is wonderful if we can be that awesome person. The truth behind is that you can only be that awesome person if you have enough done for yourself.
We all hide when we feel exhausted and depressed, we don’t want to see anyone after a cried-through night with puffy eyes, when anxiety sets in we want to hide like a snail in her house. Aren’t we loveable then at well? Of course we are because only then we learn and grow, only then we would need someone most, only then we reveal our deepest emotions.
We all need to have time for ourselves to get grounded, get settled, reconnect with our inner child, listen to the whispers of our soul. Me-time is much more than heading to the hairdresser or get our nails done. Me-Time is the time where you process all what we are exposed to on a daily level. Even if we would avoid the news we still hear stories from neighbors, families, friends – there’s love and laughter and drama, there is so much to cope with that it is overwhelming once in a while.
Life isn’t supposed to be easy, it shows us daily that there is lots of misery on this planet – now, in the middle of a pandemic even more than ever before – but life is also wonderful, even when there are times which are not easy. To realise this and not to get lost in the dark we need these times where we embrace it all.
I struggle as everyone else, sometimes more and sometimes less, and in the end not one of these struggles has been permanent.
As time goes by depressions go by, as times change anxiety changes, all is fluid and moving, we are not made of stones.
Last year was a miserable year for me, job wise, of course last year had as many wonderful moments as it had bad. But if I look back to 2019 I often see only the bad (still) because it is a process of processing what happened. This processing is only taking place when I make myself a priority, when I take a time-out and live through parts of it, meditate, or even just lay down and stare at the ceiling. Only if the bad is processed it lifts the veil of the good things that happened to me last year, and of course there were so many of them. People tend to drown in misery and that’s nothing unnormal, it’s part of human nature, it needs strengths to get out of this circle and look out for the positive. Once you start it you will be excited, believe me.
So – 2019, the year I wanted to erase in my brain – thanks I did not.
Besides all the bad stories (and they were bad not because I did something wrong!) I would’ve erased memories of our summer vacation, memories of the third birthday of our son (he doesn’t deserve that mummy forgot all about it!), our wedding anniversary in Venice, this wonderful city, Christmas with the family and all these thousands of happy memories in between.
Even the really crappy times at work left good memories because I went through it, with stomach pain, yes, but today I know they made me stronger and I learned – if there would ever be a next time I would respond earlier and set more boundaries. Karma is the word of 2019 for me because I believe that one day all people involved will feel their Karma hitting them. What goes around, comes around.
For 2020 I am not yet sure which word it could be. This pandemic hit us all in many different ways and also so similar. My plan for 2020 was to relax, to go into a sabbatical and become a Yoga Teacher, learn about Ayurveda and spend time with my family. The plan was to recharge my batteries after 2019 and be ready to start through in 2021.
We are now at the end of 2020 and I am about to finish my Yoga Teacher Training.
I tried to revive this blog – a bit at least, and I take time for myself when needed. We were closer than ever before as a family during the first lockdown due to Covid19 and if I see the news we may have a second lockdown just in front of us. I struggle, not all of the time but in between. There are days when I hardly want to leave the bed because the uncertainty is overwhelming and raises an anxiety of the unknown. How will it be, what will happen next, why do we need to experience this? But there won’t be answers to these questions right away. We may have answers in a few months, in the next years, who knows? We cannot plan life and this is one big lesson learned for someone like me who loves to plan each step ahead. No, not this time. I am forced to see what happens, to step into the unknown daily and wait for what’s next. What I can plan is to control my mindset as best as I can and believe me, this is not easy. I had two really really depressed days with anxiety and everything was overwhelming. Now, day 3 and I’m typing – I sit here with candlelight, we were on the playground before, chatting breathing fresh air and watching our children playing freely, two days ago I would not even been able to think about this. Life is good! It goes on and on and everything is flowing.
Make yourself a priority, hide for two days if needed and then you will be back and people will not scare you but uplift you. Small talks with friends will be good and create once more good memories.
Doing good things for yourself is as important as being good to others. My son needs his mom, my husband his wife and after these two days where they saw me miserable I am now back to be fun to be with. This is how life goes, even a 4 year old is not having good mood all day long – he can relate in his own childish perceptions.
For now all is good and when the next low hits us we know we will make it through – I hope you have many highs and not too much lows, a pandemic isn’t make it easier, but hey, we are all in this together and you are not alone!
***Sending you lots of love and positive vibes***
When in Tuscany…
…it is all about old villages, landscapes, chianti and la dolce vita.
Vacation time should then be even more, the above plus some beach relaxation, pool dips and museums.
This year I am sitting on the bed and am writing, besides that I am listening to Deepak Chopra’s “Metahuman”.
My husband takes care of our son and the dinner we will have soon just needs to be heated up, I cooked it yesterday.
No fancy restaurant with a four-year old, we tried, we won’t try again until maybe next year. It had nothing in common with a relaxed dinner so why to bother about it any longer? Let go of what no longer serves you, I learned this through my yoga and as nothing is permanent (another yoga wisdom) we let go and have dinner “at home” in our own safe space.
We slept really long today and were just hanging around. Playing a bit, started a washing machine (yes, you read correctly, we wash while on vacation and return with suitcases full of clean clothes, it is great), enjoyed the big terrace we have here and we stayed in the shadow because it is HOT. For September it is really much more than we expected. The sun is burning and even though my two men are not that sensitive I am – I just look at the sun and already feel my skin burning.
This year I am putting in half an hour here and there to move forward with my 200 hour yoga teacher training, which literally means learning. Learning while on vacation, some would tell me now that this is not relaxation but believe me, it is. If you love what you do then you will find joy in it and here I am – I love Yoga, I love to write, I love my family. The only little problem is how to make money with the things I love 😉 I will figure this one out later.
Soaking up the tuscan sun before we will return to an autumn kissed Munich later in September is just soothing our souls.
Even though we haven’t been personally affected with an illness due to this pandemic, we have been affected like each and everyone. Stages from not believing what starts there in this world up to being scared of what lays in front of us. It became eventually a new normal and we are lucky to be in a quite good situation money and job wise, but still, this new normal is scary from time to time and leaves us depressed.
And don’t get me wrong please, we are as free as we can be right now and we fully agree on all precautions which have been taken. But even though you know that you for instance need to stay at home for your safety it is different to staying at home just because you would like to spend a day at home doing nothing outside.
Being here is giving all of us a little rest. A new normal is different on vacation and the Italians are doing it really good! Better than some germans to be honest, maybe because they suffered more but instead of complaining they include these new rules and still celebrate life. In Germany we often have the feeling we are trapped between the complete neglect and the over-caution, it still doesn’t feel normal and one of the reasons for me is that it’s treated different wherever you go, but that is another topic.
Back to tuscan life right now. And yes, of course here the Covid-19 topic is as present as everywhere else. Our tuscan life differs not too much from the life in Munich, we just have of course much more ice cream and we cook less. Also the luxury of having a pool in front of your doorstep is definitely a big plus here. Apart from that we decide on a day by day basis what we are going to do.
Last year we stayed at the same place, we enjoyed the pool as well as the beaches nearby and we strolled through every town in driving distance. This year we step back a bit because we avoid crowded places. We have been to so many places we truly love here but we love our health more than taking any risks. Some may ask now why we went if we don’t want to explore the region? Because we know the region and we love it, because we have the possibility and because we’d rather stay around the pool than in our flat in Munich. Because we may go to one city or another…like today when we visited Siena. Much shorter than all the times before but still wonderful as city.
Our son was chasing doves on every piazza we visited, this year he can do the same still but less often.
When we were in the Tuscany and Maremma region before our son was born we enjoyed restaurants, we drank coffee in small bars with great views, we strolled peacefully through cities exploring their wonderful history, now we check for playgrounds and check tripadvisor for things to do with children.
Today we are parents of a kindergarten child, active beyond words, running still after doves but asking every why-question he can think of and talking non-stop (if not talking then singing). Naps are uncool at four because he is not a baby anymore. He is teaching us life every second and at the end of the day, which can be very long these days, the sweetest words we could hear are: This was an awesome day today, I love to be on vacation, it is fun. This alone is enough to justify that we are here right now.
Truly, even though I try to learn so much spiritually which comes along with becoming a yoga teacher, with shifting priorities, with changes in life in general, my son is one of my greatest teachers.
We make it complicated. Simplicity is often giving us more room to grow than anything else. It sets time free to do something more important. His childhood is our day to day life – we should always listen and shift priorities because his childhood will never return. It has been affected already by this pandemic, he wasn’t able to see his friends or just play freely in his kindergarten and he adapted so wonderful to the new situation. He deserves a lovely childhood more than anything else and we as his parents are the ones to make this happen!
Am I a metahuman? Nope, definitely not yet, but even if I will never be one, that will be OK. We are all OK as we are right now. Striving for success is great but stepping back once in a while to reconnect with who we are is essential!
We will live into the day and enjoy our tuscan time at our pace and after that we will see what comes next. It is pretty sure that this won’t be our last time here (and if it would be for whatever reason we could still say we enjoyed it to the fullest).
Step into your life and be in the present moment, not thinking too much about the past or the future. People forget to live because they are stuck in their past or too busy planning their future. I don’t want to miss the present moments.
Right now next to Deepak reading his book aloud on my phone my son came in with superwings on the iPad asking me for food. My feet are warm because he snuggles up upon them to be close. This moment is precious and I need top now and heat up our dinner because he won’t be that calm much longer 😉
Take care and leave comments if you like these snapshots of my life.
For the travellers, this guide is recommended from my end – we found really wonderful places in it.
Can someone explain to me why rents are increasing as if there’s no tomorrow?
I mean, honestly, I understand fully that a landlord is not giving away his house/ flat for free and wants to earn some money with it. Some money, enough money to be able to maintain everything plus money on top for their own, I got this. What I am not getting anymore is why people who rent are seen as a luxury income. Hey, and I’m not writing about deluxe apartments or big mansions, I’m writing about normal flats, houses for families.
You can argue now that it is my very own fault if I decide to live in Munich and yes, you are partly right with it. Partly because I accept that everything is a bit more expensive here than in a small countryside city, but what I do not accept is that you pay a fortune for nothing.
I am checking offers since a couple of years now and the market is truly insane. People offer for instance a house which is in the state of the 1980’s, the bathroom is a disaster, kitchen not available (means you have to bring your own), carpets everywhere also from the 1980’s, the garden not maintained at all. The size is 110 square metres and they ask for either a monthly rent of 2300 Euro (without gas and water) or if you want to buy the price is 980.000 Euro.
If only I could tell you that this is a joke, but they are indeed serious.
As a family we are willing to pay entry for the zoo, we love to go and eat outside, grab ice-cream on the way to the playground, buy local and support smaller shops in our area, we love the “hood” we are living in. But all of this would be impossible when we move to a bigger place because of these ridiculous prices.
Our current living situation is tiny, our place is small but we live where we want to live. Of course we wouldn’t mind to have more place and a garden, not at all, but not if we have to cut our visits to the museum, eating out or summer vacations.
Are only the top managers allowed to live here? Is it the newly rich clients you are looking for to spend their money here? A city will lose its spirit like this and a city will not have any more stories to tell.
Apart from ‘normal’ families, has anyone ever thought about the elder people? A 82-year old widow who would love to stay in the flat where her husband died but cannot afford it anymore. A 90-year old man who is half blind but knows all the ways he needs for his daily life by heart. A couple married for 60 years and rooted exactly where they live. There is a saying that you cannot plug a tree out of the soil and plant it somewhere else, the same counts for many of the elder. It breaks my heart if I see them shattered because they don’t know where their life will go on. I even forget about all the young ones (us included) because we could make it anywhere, still.
Munich has a history, like every other city, there are biographies of people who lived here and brought something with them. There are statues all over the city and every single one of them tells a story. We will not write further history like this. A city lives through the personalities and if these are all forced to move outside the city spirit will slowly disappear.
Every even little personality surely was not rich and famous by the time they left their footprint in the heart of this city. Some where, some were not, it has always been a good mixture and that is how it should be.
Greedy is the new normal especially when it comes to living spaces within a city. Who has the newest building, who has the best view, who is in the most expensive area,… Shouldn’t it be: who can help neighbours when needed, who can support the homeless, who smiles at strangers because life is a wonderful thing?
Instead of greed let happiness rule because it doubles if you share – at the end of the day that counts more than the number on your bank account, does it not?
Finally we decided to take a break from our munich corona quarantine routine and visit my parents. We waited so long because they are living in a small town and we wanted to avoid to bring the virus out of a big city into their area. Once we decided that we go we tried to avoid even more the contacts we had in munich than before.
Talking about our contacts, truly, that weren’t many because apart from our essential errands the only contacts we had here were neighbours which you obviously meet when you live in the same building.
These “problems” are seriously first world problems. We are both relatively young (depends from which perspective you see it) and in general healthy. Both of us were working, were because the situation changed for me already at the end of last year, but not in a bad way, and my husband “lost” his job due to corona which is also nothing bad as it gives us exclusive family-corona-time if you would like to call it that way. We are not struggling moneywise and our fridge is full.
Humans are strange – especially when they have too much time.misssfaith
What I have seen in the beginning and also throughout the course of the first weeks from this pandemic lockdown is that many people are wise. Wiser than they probably know even themselves before the pandemic started. Or how would you explain that persons with an immense knowledge of virology never thought about a career in science? Why don’t we have more people willing to study politics? There seem to be many potential leaders out there who know much better how to rule countries?
This pandemic is showing the truth and this truth is for many not as charming as they would love to be seen.
Where are all these issues coming from, I would really love to understand it? As a normal healthy person it is maybe unusual in the beginning and it may get sweaty now during summer, BUT nobody has to wear these masks 24/7. They should be worn in closed buildings, during grocery shopping, etc. Apart from this we still should try to go only when needed and not for extensive shopping trips into some malls, right?
Seriously? Even my 4-year-old wasn’t making a huge issue. Be happy that you are turning a year older! There are people who worry that not all are allowed to attend the funeral of a loved one. This is something really to be sad about!
Our family is living in a two-room apartment, what is a garden? There is plenty of nature on this planet and in many cases you don’t have to drive hours to be in a forest, on a field, at a lake…if you have a garden you are already one of the really lucky ones and you don’t realize?
It’s hard to comment here even. Do people know that there are others who have nothing to eat AT ALL? People who struggle to survive?
Yes, I’m part of the pharma industry if you want as I work in that area…and surprisingly for many I don’t say everything out there is needed! There are tons of products which may not be life saving or important. But vaccines in general saved millions of lives and still nobody ever forces you to get vaccine, right? It is still your choice in the end!
I know already what comments I may get. You cannot argue with third world problems (and this third world is already making me angry as we are one world!). I tell you YES, yes I can argue with it because a pandemic is not stopping anywhere. It is crawling into each little corner of this planet and this virus doesn’t care at all if it hits the poor or the rich. The truth is that we as the rich (and that’s what we are when we have access to health care and internet) have higher chances to survive. We may end up in hospitals, and yes, people died and will die, but they didn’t die in a dark and dirty mud hole without being seen even.
I’m so angry, angry at people who don’t realize how lucky they are, angry when everything which could help is neglected without a valid reason. It is NOT a reason if it doesn’t fit into their way of living or style. A mask isn’t matching the handbag? But you have access to masks, right?
From my perspective it is even essential to compare to be grounded again. Many were flying high as we had no limits and now we see what this can cause? Striving to go higher and higher in general is not a bad thing but it should be done in a mindful way. Question things and analyse them, are they worth doing it? Who would benefit? Would it serve others? What is it doing to the planet?
Seeing the earth recovering is wonderful and sad at the same time. It was us doing the harm!!! There’s no way to neglect this.
We all should use this time as a wake-up call to be a change.
Ok, I started with our decision to visit my parents and that’s what we did.
My lesson to take from there is the following:
A garden is wonderful and I would lie if I wouldn’t miss it but the essence of our stay is really just that. People we love are the most precious gift, to have this time together gave us all rest and strength to move forward.
One of the lessons learned and believe me, this wasn’t an easy one.
It is natural I guess – throughout or life we are doubting… if we are on the right path, doing the right thing, meeting the right people … this is needed as check or ourselves. We build up confidence like that as well.
Doubt becomes a problem when we doubt more than being sure we did something right.
When I write don’t let doubt be your friend I don’t mean it should be your enemy, you will need it, until the end of your life, like a person you meet once in a while but not regularly. Like this person you know your whole life which tells you after a couple of years that you look great, that you changed your style and it suits you, that you were always adored for your skills in whatever, you get what I mean I hope. This person can also tell you that the old car was better than the new you have chosen, but in the end you are driving that car and you need to be feeling good in it.
What are you doing with the car for instance? You may reconsider changing it back because this person had some proper arguments, or you stop thinking about it because it was well thought over in first place?
Doubt is ALWAYS just an adjuster or a confirmer, it is rarely a complete changer but more a lesson learned.
But what if you think you are doing the right thing and all of a sudden Mr. Doubt shows up regularly? He considers himself your new friend and crawls into your life. He is telling you his opinion whenever he can and it’s always the opposite of what you were considering to be right. He starts to drain your energy because it is not easy to be criticized for every step you make. And it’s wrong!
Believe me, a good colleague or a well-trained manager would NEVER make you doubt everything. they would make you aware if something isn’t going to the right direction and offer advise, training or help to fix it.
I doubted – too much, so much that I fell exhausted into my bed in the evening because I felt NOT ENOUGH. From the depth of my heart I knew that I did the right thing(s). I even knew it because I got feedback from many others but that one stupid Mr. Doubt was so present and so nagging with his comments that I started to doubt – more and more.
He stepped into my life as if he was an old friend but that’s not true. I knew him and I met him once in a while but I never considered him to be one of my close friends. The opposite, I was always happy when he disappeared and his permanent presence made me feel not good at all, not sufficient and not enough.
I had to learn this and especially I had to learn to tell him STOP!
Stop for the sake of my health – mentally and physically. Once this step was done it felt better because I gained my worth back. My knowledge that has been built up over the years could not be completely wrong as Mr. Doubt tried to make me believe. I was able again to hold my head up high and face him and tell him that he will not succeed in breaking me, because this is what he wanted as my “friend”.
Doubt is like a toxic person
We all know them and we all know that we should keep them very distanced as they otherwise would start to influence our life (and not in a good way).
Almost a year later I am sitting here typing, my stomach still hurts and seems twisted from time to time which is a reminder of what I went through. I’m not complaining because in the end I know who I am and what I am worth! In the end Mr. Doubt and his companions are the poor ones. They will never be happy in their life because as long as you are constantly criticizing others you ignore your own problems which probably are more intense than I can imagine them to be.
We are supposed to make mistakes to learn and grow. We are exactly where we should be and if someone makes you start to doubt be careful. We can support, we can share experiences, we can give a helping hand, but if we start to put ourselves higher and make others doubting their worth we are the problem, not the other persons!
The struggle to accept and realize that not everyone is my friend even though they pretend to be was long and intense and I don’t want to go through it once again. But truly, I am more mindful and focused than ever before. I’m thankful to know that not I was the problem but others.
If you read my blog before you have an idea of how I think and in this case I could be mad, I could start to hate persons who tried to harm me but that’s not me.
I don’t want to poison my thoughts with hatred, I don’t want to invite negativity to my life and I don’t want to hate. To focus on what’s positive in all this is much more rewarding and makes me happier than giving attention to the bad. It doesn’t mean that I ignore, no, I acknowledge, analyse, take my lesson out and then put it aside as it no longer serves me.
I truly hope that whenever you doubt you don’t let these thoughts taking over the reigns – they won’t guide you in a good way. Doubt is not supposed to be permanently present but occasionally only.
Always tell yourself that you are doing the best you can at that time in your life and you are learning along the way. At every second you are where you are supposed to be as the best version of you.
You are worth to kick Mr. Doubt out if he starts to approach you more than you can take. It’s your life!
Stay strong and never doubt the wholeness of your being!
Have you ever thought about it recently? I guess so. This is one of the questions you read on magazines but who has the answer?
The answer is in all of us, in each and every single person alive right now.
Many have lost loved ones – they will surely answer with an yes, but in all honesty, this is not what I mean when I ask.
What I mean is more the question, if this pandemic state is able to change us all in a way that we step away from old habits, that we overthink our whole life, that we start to realise what we need and what we don’t need.
The economy is down, almost in a state which cannot be repaired quickly, but why?
All of us are (and were) buying what we needed during the past three to four months. We were not lacking food and had still enough clothes to wear.
This just shows me one thing: the majority of what the economy is made of is NOT IMPORTANT.
Do we need so many not important items to be available? Or should we start to change our lifes?
Why don’t we drive cars until they are old? Why don’t we wear denims until they have holes? Why do we need so much which is not serving any purpose.
Now you can argue that all serves a purpose because it makes us happy.
Shouldn’t it be something you feel, experience with someone else, something mundane like an astonishing sunset?
The more I think about this whole situation which is affecting us world wide the more I start to realize what we did, not only to this planet, but also to ourselves. Me included of course. If you have no access to certain things you start to understand their importance and truly the most important during this time is the people you love. Who cares if you wear the newest pair of jeans while sitting on the grass somewhere or stroll through the fields? Who cares if your hair has the newest colour available when you are at home?
Are we not confident enough to be truly who we are? Of course many things are nice to have and I for instance love to use nail polish, but if it’s not available would it kill me? Nope.
We often excuse it with economical reasons, we do it because we support someone else with it – but truly, if you get your nails done in the cheapest Vietnamese store are you seriously supporting?
If no invitations for events are coming in any more because they are not allowed – how many of your friends call you to ask how you feel?
In the end, I think what I want to say is that everyone should realize how wonderful a life already is and can be without all these superficial items added. Of course they should not vanish and will not vanish but if one thinks twice before adding something “not essentially needed” to his or her life we would have made a huge step forward towards a different world.
Let’s walk together into a future which isn’t build on superficial thoughts – walk into it hand in hand and with an outlook towards a better world than it has been. Together we can achieve so much!
It’s unbelievable how you feel when you see your own child with your parents or your siblings.
Since our son was born in April 2016 we drove more often than ever before to my parents. Family time for all of us.
When I grew up I had my grandparents close by, from moms side direct next to us and from dads side a ten minutes walk away.
Now we are in Munich and we have 550 kilometres between us.
Family is so important and our son should feel the same about his family as we did when we were little.
At the moment we have more family time than ever before due to the quarantine, unfortunately just the three of us as we obviously are at home. But even this time will once be a memory and we should take it as a gift. Who has throughout the normal day-to-day schedules such an intense time with the family?
Surely, I would lie if it’s all joy and fun and laughter, we are stressed, we reach limits, we would love to stay in bed a whole day but with a 4-year old this is unimaginable. We are human beings, we cannot handle everything, we need to adapt, learn, fall, stand up again and try.
Now we are patiently (most of the time) waiting for news which enable us to visit my parents, at least some contact to family, we start to be tired of phone calls and facetime, but at the end of the day I need to remind myself that it’s fine. All is fine and we are here and healthy and very fortunate.
There are thousands of facebook groups where I read the most weird theories about this pandemic, where parents complain that their children will be traumatized once all of this is over, where people are seriously thinking we all will be vaccinated against our will, …
There are days where I cannot take it all in anymore, where I just scroll further, tired of so much nonsense. Then there are days where I start to argue, trying to explain that I see it differently, trying to explain why it is nonsense what some are posting but it is like talking to walls. And then I wonder, where are their families? Are they all thinking so weird?
One really important part I love about family time – the exchange, the discussion, the pure honesty. If I talk bullshit tis is exactly what I get to hear. Everything is discussed and at the end of the day we are all (for the main topics) thinking at least in the same direction and if anyone of us would now start to explain that tomorrow someone will start to vaccinate all people born on November, 12th, because this is how Bill Gates wrote it in his secret diary I am 100% sure we would be able to turn this person into the right direction – with facts!
Family time during quarantine is different, yes, but it is also a big chance to build some memories. We can spend so much time together to do things we normally don’t do. Spending hours in nature to stare at the clouds, to watch snails climbing up a small tree (normally nobody has the patience anymore to sit and wait until she reaches the top), being just us without pressure and without someone running after us to do this and that until yesterday if possible.
I know that these times are scary as well, believe me, and if I focus on the good I don’t neglect the bad which is of course there as well. Some days I feel the panic bubbling in me and anxiety which stops me from everything other than laying down and let it pass. BUT, and I extra write it in capital bold letters, I don’t want to let the negative outweigh the positive. To focus on the good is healthier than focussing on the bad. Do you know the law of attraction? This is one of the lessons, you attract what you think and as I don’t want any of these negative stories in my life I acknowledge their presence, I’m sorry for the people who were hit so hard already, I try to help where I can (like supporting locals for instance) and then I let the negative pass my life and focus on the good.
How are you living the quarantine? Are you depressed, do you see it as a chance, tell me how the quarantine life is for you.
Day 1 – What kind of food are you most grateful for?
So many to be honest but if you ask me to break it down to one then (as a German) I would say dark bread. Fresh still warm dark bread with just butter is so simple yet delicious.
Day 2 – Who in your life are you grateful for?
My family and that includes literally all of them – every single one has a Special place in my heart and taught me something, teaches me something, makes me feel loved and enough the way I am – they Show me my best and my worst sides and with them I can be just me.
Day 3 – What recent moment are you grateful for?
These mornings when the first I see when opening my eyes is the smile on my son’s face.
Day 4 – Which skill are you grateful for?
Being empathic is one which is I guess more worth than being a good writer or cook. Showing emotions, listening to others, feeling their pain up to a certain level makes life more meaningful. But of course, I do not want to miss a good homemade lunch as well 🙂
Day 5 – What about your body are you especially grateful for?
Being alive and healthy – if you are alive your body is doing a tremendous job, I try to treat my body well and of course there are pizza-days and chocolate but in general I see it as my duty to treat my Body as my temple, because without it I would not be here.
Day 6 – What technology are you grateful for?
The world wide web – this is amazing how we can connect across the globe and if we use it mindfully the Internet is one of the greatest technologies ever.
Day 7 – What smell are you grateful for?
The scent of my new-born son. The most wonderful smell on earth.
Day 8 – What sights are you thankful for?
Right now, in a corona quarantine situation all sights I have ever seen. Memories of former vacations are so precious.
Day 9 – What books are you grateful for?
My all-time favourite because it opened my eyes during a difficult time is “Eat, pray, love” from Elizabeth Gilbert. Each time I touch it I still find something new and valuable for me.
The traditions I grew up with and am now able to show to my son, like Christmas cookie baking, painting Easter eggs, simple things which are lovely memories of my childhood for me and I hope my son can one day say the same.
All available colours – without all of them life would be dark and sad.
Touch / Feeling is the most important, without I would not know how soft baby skin is.
Sight to discover the beauty of this planet.
Hearing – the birds singing in the morning is music to wake up to.
Taste and smell are both amazing – the smell of freshly cut grass gives me a full summer feeling and the taste of so many things would be a real lack in life. Salty water, snowflakes in winter, the orange peel with his bitter-sweet taste.
Balance is a great sense in life and a great reminder of this question is that I need to focus more on balance in my life.
Body awareness is the last I guess and should be one of the first to be grateful for. Feeling good in your own body is the first step to a healthy self-acceptance.
Summer / late summer is my favourite season. These long evenings and nights where all seem to be possible. I cannot stand the cold even though I love some snowy days, but summer is the right feel-good temperature for me.
There were some challenges and obstacles in life as for everyone – did I overcome them? Maybe. I think most I took as lessons learned not to step into them unprepared if they show up the next time. Life is a flow and maybe some parts of them swim next to me occasionally but most of the days I keep them behind me and remember how to treat them if they speed up.
My son’s heartbeat – the sweetest sound I heard before I even knew he is a boy.
All the places I travelled so far – it is amazing to discover the world and every single place has left an imprint on my life.
What in nature am I not grateful for?
Technology – especially now during this pandemic we can be incredibly grateful to stay in contact with family and friends on a distance.
Everything has its time – even though I would love to stop the time sometimes to stay longer in wonderful moments, this knowledge is immensely helpful in times where I don’t feel well, as this will pass too.
My parents – and they still are!
The laughter of my son and my husband in the background while I am typing here.
Being able to be weak and surrender to what is, nobody can be strong all the time.
The change which came with motherhood, being a mom is wonderful.
I love the night when everything is still, but I also like long summer evenings.
Being authentic is I guess the most important. You may not be friends with everyone but at the end of the day I stay true to myself.
Oh so many, our Tuscany trip when I was pregnant, our Cyprus trip which was the first vacation together, the first family holiday when our son saw the sea for the very first time, the clear blue water of the Caribbean on the Turks and Caicos Islands, I could start to list all now.
What goes around comes around.
No things but the persons, my two men!
To write and be somehow creative.
We are alive, we are all healthy, that is such a huge blessing already!
Wow, we made it already to week 10 of this crazy corona quarantine and more than 3 weeks now additionally with a fasting husband at home.
If you ask me how I feel – a mixture of insanity, being tired, running out of ideas for our son, trying to move forward with my yoga teacher training, keeping the mood bearable, when will this be over???
As I know my husband since 2011 we are I guess one of the lucky couples who knew each other already well enough to “survive” a lock-down and a quarantine with no real end in sight (why has this virus to be so greedy – it’s enough little covid, time for you to disappear, please!).
As parents we were put into the situation to be…yeah, to be parents still, right? I need to admit that we are currently in the very fortunate situation to be at home, so no worry about how to get work done while having to take care of our son, this helps immensely and I remember my home office days with him around me too – if you are able to complete 50% of your tasks with your child at home then kudos (it’s like reaching level 200 in Super Mario I guess). I can’t say thanks often enough for platforms like pinterest to give us idea 196 for DIY projects with a 4 year old but also need to mention one book which gave us lots of inspiration and great times already.
Recommended so much (and no cooperation or link where I earn something) – I bought it just because I discovered Laura Brand on Instagram and her ideas are indeed magical!
I’m not lying – there are days where I want to hide under the blanket the whole day watching nonsense on Netflix uninterrupted because I cannot face this world anymore. But then a little hand reaches out to me and I know I cannot. These times are scary and uncertain but my fear is nothing to teach my son – his childhood lays on us and we are the ones to build memories for him. I want him to remember this as a very intense family time, a time we spent happily together, walking through the forest, discovering snails, searching for flat stones to draw on at home. This is our destiny, isn’t it? So we have to make the best out of it!
And writing about destiny – today is day 71 of our quarantine and tonight is the night of destiny in Ramadan. My husband told me last night and shame on me, he tells me each year the meaning but I often forget the whole story behind. As a short explanation:
Allah the Almighty states in the Holy Koran: “Surely, we sent it [the Koran] on the Night of Destiny. And what should make thee know what the Night of Destiny is? The Night of Destiny is better than a thousand months. Therein descend angels and the Spirit by the command of their Lord with their Lord’s decree concerning everything. Peace — so will it be even at the rising of the dawn.” (Surah al-Qadr, Ch 97: V 1-6)
So tonight will be the night of great blessings where god (Allah the Almighty) showers his mercy upon faithful believers. In the Koran it’s said the revelation of the Koran began on this very night. Especially in its last ten days there has been the a showering of blessings and mercy in the month of Ramadan.
If you want to read more in depths you can visit this site:
When you know my blog you know that my husband is muslim whereas I am not – we live very well with these different beliefs but of course we discuss lots. But what we also do, and that’s I guess is the most important, we support each other in what we do. So when he is fasting during the month of Ramadan I adapt (not always to his mood 🙂 but to the schedule) and I like some of the rituals. We should spend a peaceful night tonight and there’s nothing wrong with that. Maybe there are angles, a spirit, a higher force – I am not the one who judges that. Especially when you raise a child together you need to treat each other with full respect and that’s what we do.
As yogi I believe more in destiny in general – not linked to a certain religion. There surely are shifts and I very often use the sentence “it was meant to be” and that’s what I belive in. The choices we make are made for reasons and they guide us to where we should be. If it turned out to be a direction we don’t feel fine in then we take it as a lesson learned and move on.
This is also the way from my perspective to treat this quarantine. Of course I made plans in the beginning (10 weeks ago), we can do so many great things as a family together. And of course this didn’t work out. There were days where I was struggling so so much with anxiety and panic, there were days where our mood was only enough to stare at the TV in disbelief of what’s going on, there were days where we stayed in our PJs from dusk till dawn and that’s OK. If it already taught me one thing than to let go. Letting go of trying to be strong when I feel weak – both are vaild and both are essential in life. Only when you know how it feels to be weak you can be strong.
Tell me, how do you experience this quarantine? I’d love to hear stories from around the globe because one thing is for sure:
We are all in this together!
Stay safe and healty
I did it – I signed up for a 200 hour yoga teacher Training.
This day will be marked in my calendar as the first step towards a major shift.
When, where, why, what for – all of this will be something I may share in future posts.
For now I just want to shout out that I finally made the decision to sign up and to start this journey.
I’m literally burning, I want to soak in and learn, dive into the depth of my being and move from one Asana to another. I want Yoga in my life and I want to understand more about it.
It already feels like a wonderful decision and now it’s up to me to start.
Yoga Plays a role in my life since several years and this decision was already overdue I guess. I wrote several Posts About yoga already – one for example is this one https://misssfaith.yoga/2017/05/18/yoga-isnt-my-religion/
Now I will sit back and celebrate this first major decision of 2020 – off to new ways!!!
What has been your first major decision in 2020?
If you are interested in becoming a Yoga Teacher, I can recommend you the book “Teching Yoga beyond Poses”. It was one big inspiration for me and made it easy to finally sign up for the training.
Children are the future – unless we need to do something important…
Yes, the headline is meant exactly like that and unfortunately this is often the truth!
My son is three years old and he is in daycare since he was 14 months old.
Yes and no.
To afford our life we had no other option and yes, we could have moved to a village where life is cheaper and reduce the hours at daycare but then we would stop our careers. It is a balance of what we want for our child and our life and our job.
Last week the kindergarten has been closed for a day and we knew this for a while to arrange this day differently. Planning Always works fine for us.
But last week he started on exactly that day to have fever and a starting cough.
It has not been a question at all that he stays at home and that I am with him (simply because it’s easier in my job). A couple of days later I went with him to the paediatrician because he was still not as fine as we hoped for after the weekend. No more fever but not as active and happy as we know him. He still barely ate and that was very unusual for him.
He fully checked him, asked what happened up to that day and then recommended how to move forward.
The recommendation was as follows:
“Your son has a cold, keep an eye on his ears and his throat because it’s slightly inflamed, it may fade as it seems as if he went already through the worst part but it may worsen as well and then please come back.
For the cough he gets a medication for the night so be sleeps well and recovers, throughout the day please give him lots of tea and honey, fluids are important and not too much action.”
OK, sounded like a plan and I was guessing the same before (mother’s instinct?). Before I left I just asked the following question out of curiosity: “When will he be allowed to go back to the kindergarten?”
Answer: “As he’s free of fever for two days already you can bring him tomorrow, if you have the possibity to keep him at home for another one to two day even better.”
I am in the lucky position to be able to keep him at home and did that until he was entirely fine (which turned out not to be after 1 to 2 but after 4 days at home). But what about parents who are not able to do that?
What about all the people out there who are frightened of losing their job if they stay at home, who are paid per hour and need each cent to afford the minimum standard of living, who are single parents, who have nobody around like grandparents, … there will be many scenarios which happen daily and which cause children to be in their daycare even though not fully recovered and healthy.
Imagine you are this child, you don’t feel well and your safest place is the lap of your mom or dad, resting your head on their chest listening to their heartbeat, your sweetest lullaby, and feeling simply a bit better because of the warmth and smell and love you know since you are alive. This is your place to fully relax and let go and surrender. But what happens is that instead you need to visit a place you know very well but it’s loud and children are asking if you want to play, your nose runs but nobody realizes instantly, you don’t feel fine but you try to smile throughout the day.
You are just three years old, this is not what you should learn, how to pretend to feel good, you should be where you indeed would feel as good as you can while being still a bit ill.
If I see how often my son comes to snuggle for no visible reason when he’s not fully fine I just can imagine how he would feel all alone in the kindergarten on a day like that. He starts to cry for things which normally don’t bother him, I know he would not cry there.
I know that he would not be “all alone” but it’s like standing in a crowd and feeling like the lonliest person on earth.
My heart truly aches if I think what he would need to go through and then I wonder if it would be worth it? As written, some cannot choose and I appreciate it BUT, and there is a really HUGE but to this whole topic.
There are many parents out there where one parent stays at home and the most interesting part now is the following. Very often the parent’s who could not afford it stay with their children until they are recovered while the ones who could do so simply prefer to be somewhere else…brunching with friends, going to the gym, the long scheduled hair dresser appointment,….
I just want to ask all of you – please be responsible, take care of this little soul, children can feel abandoned quickly and in such cases they are even totally right to feel so. What matters most is not the happy employer or the well done hair, what matters most is that our children are as well as they deserve to be.
We have chosen to be parents, care-takers (maybe the better word here) – it is our duty to be there when they need us most!
We don’t want to raise a generation of people who don’t know that it means to be taken care of and who think it’s normal to be at work not feeling well. A generation of pretenders, is this what we want? Surely not, at least not for me.
We are the basis they build up their life on. Don’t let this be shattered to pieces – our health is the most important – all we are is connected to how we feel.
If you agree please be so kind and share, comment, spread this message – we are responsible for the future and we need to take ownership here!
Sending love <3
It’s a lifestyle I can’t Escape, even if my inner lazy self would love too, once in a while.
I think I’m totally lost (some would say), lost in the sense of being unable to live without Yoga.
This journey started when I was lost and down to earth.
I was literally down on my knees because I treated myself not in the way I should have.
I guess everybody reaches a time in his / her life where you are forced to change something; something profoundly.
For me this change happened in 2011 and it was just the starting point. I wasn’t sure if my way would bring me up on my feet again or if I had to seek professional help one day.
Books and Yoga was my way and on top a single vacation which was needed more than I was aware when I planned it.
The adventure of my vacation is also on the blog:
Ever since the decision to change my life the term Yoga is a present part of my life. Some days more and some days less, like waves. On days which are exhausting the waves are stronger and the urge to dive into my yoga is more present than on peaceful days.
Yoga has been my therapy. No, yoga is my therapy!
My drug, my realm, my happy place, my hideaway…it is bigger than visible for outsiders because so much takes place inside of me.
I may not be a typical yogi which raises the question what a typical yogi is.
This picture of how a yogi should be is changing fortunately because a yoga lifestyle is as individual as human mankind is. Nothing is typical, there are no rules on what need to be fulfilled, the only important point is: be authentic and live in a way you are feeling comfortable with!
Every yogi out there is following an individual path and none is better than the other. To learn not to judge others is a big lesson because we all tend to judge others.
How can she call herself yogi if she never stepped into a yoga studio?
How can she write about Yoga without being able to do a handstand?
How can she tell others she’s leading a yoga lifestyle if she is not rolling out her mat daily?
I can and I do because of all of this.
Who is able to tell you who you are, if not you yourself?
The first person being sure about how your life is going along, what path you are on, how you feel about certain topics, how happy you are is: YOU YOURSELF!
One of the biggest lessons in life for me has been that nobody except of me can tell me how I feel or who I am or what I need. I am in charge of it and I decide what I need and what I don’t need. I decide what I want and what I don’t want.
I tell you who I am and nobody else is telling me who they think I am!
Trust your journey and walk your path. This is the best advice I have to give simply because this is what I do. I may be wrong on my way but that’s fine, only if you walk in the wrong direction once in a while you will be able to readjust and turn things upside down to find your right direction.
You are worth to live in a way you want and if this includes yoga, religion, music, literature, any interest you have to feel better, then DO IT!
My way is the yoga way and this includes many side ways as well and at the end of the day my theme is “Yogain’t a choice any more” because it lives within me. Yours may be “Vegain’t a choice any more”, “Shambalain’t a choice any more” or whatever you choose / have Chosen for your life to have a profound impact-
Trust your journey and live it. Lots of love <3
A whole new year lays ahead of us and I’m excited.
Excited and positive, anxious and scared.
Life is unpredictable which makes it interesting but scary at the same.
As a perfectionist you are going to hate it not to know what comes next but the truth is, we will never know what comes next. Neither planning nor wishing will bring us to the point that a life is going as smoothly as we would like.
I just need to look around our home and since we have a child it looks sometimes as if a bomb of Lego and toy animals exploded.
The wonderful part of these “explosions” is that there is life! I admit that I would sometimes which for this old home where you don’t have to clean 24/7 without an end in sight, the times where I just sat down on the couch with a book because nothing else needed to be done. Nowadays there is no “nothing else needs to be done”. This wishing back the old days are only short moments because reality quickly sets in and I’m so grateful for this reality.
Life is far far far away from perfect and this imperfection is so lovely. We are the happiest when we three are together (my son, my husband and I) because indeed, that’s life, that’s reality, that’s all to wish for.
The perfectionist in me is almost crying because I have no idea how this year will go along but what I know is that we can manage all as long as we are a family and love each other like we do.
Is it wisdom that comes with age? I don’t know. Is it what you learn through motherhood? Maybe.
I cannot tell you when exactly this thinking was setting in for me-The more I think about life and what matters most the more I realize that there are profound things like love, trust, emotions, feeling grounded, mindfulness, thankfulness for what is, appreciation of what we have. These are what matters most.
The NOW of our life.
Tomorrow can be anything but if we manage to be happy now we reached a lot!
I’m not a spiritual teacher nor a motivation guide but the more I read and the more I do some research the more I see that many seem to seek happiness and fulfillment.
Our life has far too many choices to reach this stage and we get lost. We lose focus due to the amount of possibilities we have.
Nobody can have it all! I think this is the first and most important step towards an inner satisfaction of what is.
We need to stop ourselves along the way, take a step back, and start to sort. What are our personal priorities, what makes us really happy.
Social media are great, if used properly, and at the same time our personal nightmare, if used as a comparator (in both directions).
As long as we are realistic enough to know that we never ever see the whole picture on social media the usage may be utterly inspiring, we can learn lots and get input. There are some influencers out there who are really showing lots, their raw authentic self, but careful, for the majority we will never grasp the full picture and this is completely OK. We ourselves would also not expose our most vulnerable moments or dark sides to strangers. Just be sure that everyone has these sides (just not visible). The trick is to get inspired by the exposed good stories but don’t feel less worth because of our own failures.
The same goes for news – I barely read them nowadays because I feel more and more depressed, it seems as if there is no peace on earth at all but that’s wrong. Nobody will write a headline about a country at peace. We are responsible to filter all of this for ourselves because no news agency and no influencer and no person besides you is able to see what you need or what you can take at this moment.
You are the first responsibility for yourself and afterwards you decide what you watch, listen to, hear, read, where you step in, help, work, etc. This sounds selfish but it isn’t. Only if you feel at ease with yourself you will be capable of taking the rest.
My husband’s country is in a war state since we met. It won’t help if we start to site here each day and cry and complain and talk about how blessed we are to live here and what an injustice it is that his family is there and and and – it simply won’t help! We need to make sure that we are fine, we are parents, we have a responsibility. And when we are fine we can work, we can try to support, we can be the realistic part on the outside as we are not within, we can be the uplifting part when things go wrong again and try to soothe, we can only give our best in these moments. It is hard but that’s life – unfortunately – we cannot change the world but we can change our approach to our “small” circle in this world and try to be good examples. If everyone would be the best version of him or herself we would make a step in the right direction.
And at teh end of the day my biggest mantra for this year will be nobody is perfect and new ways are always possible – these sentences from a perfectionist are a big step.
My lessons learned from the past years. They may be an inspiration or just a small hint in which direction to think.
Being grateful for what we have and never taking anything for granted is one of the biggest epiphanies ever.
Living in a country without knowing war is not my achievement, it was simply luck of being born here at that time. Thanks!
Having met my husband was such a coincidence, this could never have been planned. Thanks!
Having a really full fridge is a blessing. Thanks!
You could go on like this but you know what, waking up each morning, feeling my heart beating should be reasonenough to be grateful for this life.
A whole new year…lays in front of us.
Let’s focus on the good.
Let’s try to ease the pain.
Let’s help where we can.
Let’s do what we can to make this a better place for all of us.
This year, next year and as long as we are here.
…and as always we are asking the same old questions. What do you wish for? Is there anything I can buy? Which gifts would be on your wish list?
Isn’t it ridiculous in a way? We beg to give something even though we had a whole year of making our loved ones happy.
What I realize more each year is why my parents tell us since so long that they have all they need. It is indeed true that the time spend together and the memories we make throughout the years are more than we could ever wish for.
Time is the greatest gift. Time well spend with your family.
Even though we know this now we surely will run on last minute and get things wrapped up, an empty floor around the christmas tree is not much appealing, but deep within us we know that nobody will be disappointed when we unwrap the little presents because all we need is already there.
I wish you a merry christmas and lots of time to be spend with your loved ones.
One gift for myself is that I want to revive my page – it seems as if a lifetime passed since I posted the last time.
Stay healthy and happy and soon more.
This question popped up just this morning when I opened Instagram.
I must confess, I like Instagram and I often go in and check and find inspiration and ideas how to live more sustainable, I see great campaigns against many injustices on this planet, I follow people I adore like Deepak Chopra or Ram Dass and this is great.
But what I also see is that there are thousands of women who call themselves influencer, mom blogger, whatever name you want to give them, who expose their whole families, grandparents and neighbors of neighbors to the world wide web. They literally “sell” their life and feel like kind of a celebrity.
I mean, seriously, I show my home, my sacred place and start to tag everything from the lamp on the ceiling to the rug on the floor, I give away shopping codes and link web pages while hoping that people love me and follow my life and at the end of the day BUY.
This kind of commercializing products is not only weird, it’s also going into a direction where being unique seems to be outdated.
Every mom blogger account has the same brands (at least for what I can see in Germany), the wear the same jewelry, call themselves even designer because they put their name on products they designed? To be a designer for you normally need to attend classes in a design school, university, whatever, but hey, this is the easy way, right? They eat the same, the drink the same tea, they own the same coffee machines in their stylish mainly white colored new built homes and their kids have the same toys and clothes and prams. All for the price of inviting people into their life on a daily basis, day in and day out, from morning to bedtime routine, being healthy or not feeling fine.
I’m honest and especially the ones who build up their life like this will not agree on it, but filling the washing machine with the camera in my hand or making a time-lapse of how I clean the kitchen is NOT real life and is far away from what we should do with our time.
As wonderful as all these technologies are, as careful they need to be handled. What do we teach our children when we document every step we take, inside and outside? What do we teach them if mommy is putting on her make up each day in front of the phone while she’s talking to the phone instead of talking to her child?
Did you ever check your screen time per day? I know that it hits you once you start to focus on it, at least it hit me when I checked it, because this screen time means that you spent the time with a phone in your hand instead of being in the real NOW.
Eckhart Tolle wrote this wonderful book “the power of NOW” and I can recommend this to everyone – we are all right now here and we should spend our time wisely.
If it’s your job and your income to advertise and to sell, that’s great, but do it need the 24/7 exposure to the whole world? Isn’t it enough to create good selling content and pictures and tutorials?
I may never understand but wanted to share as I feel we are heading to a time where personal contact starts to be rare and real life exists only in form of a hashtag.
Go out, meet friends, take your children to the playground and just sit there, watching the leaves dancing in the wind with the sound of children laughing and playing, that’s real life, at least for me.
Recently I have the feeling as if nothing seems to be important anymore except of “standing out of the crowd” or “being exceptional” or also “being utterly successful”.
Is this really all that matters? Why are we live through our jobs instead of bringing our personality into work? Counted as numbers and cherished only when achievements are visible.
Corporate life is seriously making me tired and let me wonder what I can change to be more mindful and more human in what I’m doing.
My recent job is project manager in a quite big research company, but the truth is, it doesn’t matter if I’m a manager or a worker, I need to fulfill my job obligations like everyone else. The only difference is that I wonder if I’m in a position to change things profoundly, because this is what it would need to make me happy with what I’m doing.
I work with a team, several teams on different projects, and I’m supposed to manage the project which also means to manage the team. It’s getting harder to do this recently because we are put under pressure from so many different angles that I already struggle and I’m in this position quite a while and know how to distinguish between important and not important. The trend is to focus on the not important because a few upper management people sat together and thought they need more oversight and so they set goals for them internally and to meet these metrics we need to report.
Of course there is a need of oversight and I fully understand this need, but what I don’t understand is how the priority setting can drift so far away from our job?
If I should give you an example – you are working with animals and the utmost importance lays on the health of these animals then what would you rather do? Go to the office and calculate how much you paid for food for the past 6 months in order to be prepared to justify in case someone would ask you in a couple of months OR take care of the current situation where an animal is sick and urgently needs a vet to check on its health?
You see what I’m talking about?
We run reports, we fill in excel sheets, we sit in conference calls almost 60% of our time, we ensure that all metrics look awesome but at the end of the day we forgot what we are actually working on.
The worst time eaters are meetings, and again, of course there are meetings that make a change but be honest, in most meeting we have throughout a week we aren’t productive. We talk about work that has been completed (which obviously could be shared in an email), we talk about where we are on this day (which is OK in meeting one of a week) and we talk about what we need to do to reach goals. But instead of staring to work on these goals we jump right into the next meeting, and the next, and the next, and then it’s 2 pm and we completely forgot to have lunch but cannot go anyway because we have to use the one-hour time-slot before the next meeting to actually work.
I have many colleagues with families and children, and also those without, one thing is equal for all of us at the end of the day when we are exhausted in our own home falling asleep early because we know what awaits us the next day at work: We start to wonder if we work for a living or live to work.
The answer is clear for me. I work for a living, this is not a question at all, but I also realize more and more that I want to see a change – be it a major shift of my personal work life or be it a major shift of valuing employees in the company I’m working for.
We all know these workaholics and we will never change their perception, that’s fine, but we need a change for the rest. I want to be able to focus on priorities and I want these priorities to be the humans, the clients who pay in the end and the purpose of each project I’m working on. I don’t want internal administration to take all this away from me for the sake of having vice presidents eating salmon tartes at a meeting somewhere to praise themselves.
I want colleagues who love their job and not colleagues who struggle to get their work done because its simply too much.
I want also healthy people around me and not people who drag themselves sick into offices because they are scared to lose their job.
I want to have working hours flexible but respected, I don’t want to receive meeting invites for 8 pm my time just because others are too ignorant to realize that they are in a different time zone.
I want managers who care about their people and wish them a well-deserved weekend instead of asking them on a Friday noon for some extra work.
Do I want far too much? I don’t think so because it’s known that happy people are more productive than unhappy people. So hey, companies out there, what are you waiting for?
It’s not really too complicate to make employees happy.
Provide them with a proper workplace
Ensure they have coffee, tea and water supply
Offer them a time to have lunch
Allow them to take their work home when needed
Be as flexible as you expect it from your employee
Ensure they can handle the amount of work within their scheduled work time
Show them that you support families
Give them a bonus work good work
This list could go on but I hope you realize what I mean – I did not even add the high salary because not everything is about money. Of course we want to be paid properly for our work (and it would be nice if women finally can be paid equally rather sooner than later) but what we want is a work place that appreciates US and is not treating us like a number in the system. We can only be good at work if we feel good, if we are healthy, if we are supported when needed.
I see people quitting to go into lower paid jobs to stay mentally sane – honestly, this is where we need a shift! It can’t be that companies lose good people because they don’t care about their people.
I’m furious if I hear these stories and then I realize that one day I may be the one who quits because I cannot handle the amount of stress anymore. Recently a 6 months vacation sounds like paradise for me and I bet I wouldn’t miss a day at work. That’s sad because it’s well known that people who love their job are doing them better than people who don’t.
Change to more humanity, change and make all of us happy because I promise you will see results after a short time – not because we run like hamsters in a wheel but because the more focused we work the better the results will be – EVERYWHERE!
LoVe from misssfaith
This will be another blog post.
Meanwhile while I am writing that one I would like to know from you:
What means Yoga for you?
I look forward to all your answers <3∞
One month is gone already – it’s February!
We are getting closer to the renewal time of spring. How lovely is alone this thought.
In general I like winter, if it would be the winter we all dream of. Snowy landscapes, cosy homes, steaming tea cups, children building a snowman…
The problem is that my winter doesn’t look like that. Whenever we would have time for these real snow days there is no more snow but grey mud or even worse just rain.
The first time my son was on his new slide was the last so far because since then there either was no snow or in the snow regions it was so much that they called out the emergency status. That means we have a new slide, a new snow suit, even wonderful warm boots but no snow.
The same goes for the snowman. As wonderful as a winter could be, this winter wasn’t showing up like we wished (at least not in Munich).
Others may say now that this isn’t entirely true, and they are right. The winter for us wasn’t like we wished for. We work from Monday to Friday and only the weekend is the time where we could fully enjoy the winter-wonderland. If we would have had time throughout the week our feeling towards this winter would be different.
I’m not complaining, we are fine, we won’t break into tears because of these missed snowportunities 🙂
The interesting part is indeed how different we all see things.
My husband is Libyan, for him everything under 0°C is too cold to go outside unless you have to. For me, I like the warm days more but it’s OK if it’s cold. I learned there is no wrong weather, there are only wrong clothes, that’s the way to handle the weather in Germany. And our son? With almost three years he is simply exploring the world. If it’s cold or warm, dry or wet, lighted up or dark, he will always find something on every single day that is interesting.
We started into this year with a month full of snow, rain, grey days and a bit of winter sun. The first half of January was a re-adjusting at work for me. Even if the break between Christmas and the new year is just a couple of days it seems as everyone is starting new and not too stressed into another year. The second half took the speed up again and currently I ask myself how to survive a full year with this level of stress.
The simple answer would be February.
I know that my work life will change a bit in the next months as projects are closed and new are starting. I hope there will be more time again to focus on my development, professional as well as private.
As days start to be longer again we will wait patiently for the spring to spend more and more time outside. The lack of sunshine is draining the last depots. Even better to have the possibility to plan a short vacation before the long summer vacation this year.
Travelling with a toddler is not pure relaxation but indeed a wonderful experience. We plan another flight with him in March and look already forward to new discoveries.
Apart from that I guess the only plan is to enjoy more and worry less.
Going back to what really counts in life is one of the keys to happiness. Our jobs are eating lots of time and if we don’t work we worry about work. That’s not how it’s supposed to be. Once you are out of the office you should start to enjoy your private leisure time. Somehow many forgot how it works.
We don’t live to work until we die. The purpose in life should be greater and bigger than heading to work and be a good employee, employer, boss, manager, consultant, sales assistant, truck driver, whatever you work. Where are the happy men and women, mothers and fathers, sisters and brothers, wives and husbands, cousins, artists, dancers, hippies, all these who don’t have places in their work?
At work I am a manager but the rest of my life I am a woman, a mom, a wife, a yogi, a painter, a cook, an artist, a writer, a blogger, a psychologist, a healer and so much more. I need this work-free time to be happy in everything else that I’m here for and being stressed because of my job should not have a place there. Not I, neither my husband nor my son deserve to be surrounded by a stressed person.
It’s hard to let go and just be. I know because I’m not good at it but I try. I will never stop trying to let go as it is one important part for my own sanity.
One month is already gone. Eleven more will follow until we reach 2020 and what do we want to remember? The sleepless nights of worry, the break-downs of being over-worked, the mistakes we made?
No, we want to remember the lessons learned, the laughter, the love that surrounded us. We want to remember the good time which was more than the bad time. To reach this we have to let go and that means to shift our focus. At work my focus is on my work but as soon as I shut down my laptop and turn off my phone the focus is on me and my family – that’s where it belongs to.
I wish you all a shift of your own personal focus. Let go of what isn’t needed at all and minimize the stress as best as you can.
Months are passing by so fast – we need to cherish the time we have!
Less is more – my way to minimalism
Minimalism is something I like so much. It gives you room, space, air – open spaces are a symbol of liberty.
How to start and apply this minimalism in a small flat which once was a single home? Now this is the home of our family, means my son, my husband and me and a change is needed.
This sentence is partly true.
I am de-cluttering, everything, every tiny space in the house will be turned upside down. While doing this I start to realize how many things we have, how many unused items, how much of what doesn’t make us happier because most of it is hidden behind doors, in the back of an wardrobe buried under something else.
What do we use and wear frequently, what do we use and wear from time to time, what do we use and wear never?
Sorting out makes me feel good. This act of letting go is not only sorting my wardrobe but also sorting my life.
How much do you have in your life that doesn’t make you happy?
Have you ever thought about it?
How many white shirts does one single person need? Seriously, even if you wear them 24/7, even if you change it twice a day – the amount of clothes in my wardrobe isn’t to be justified. Not even if I try to find an excuse.
This overflow is present wherever we go. I think we are a generation with an amount of choices that is hard to handle, especially when someone has not yet developed a certain kind of confidence.
If your path in life is not yet clear and you are searching for your personal way you will find thousands of possibilities and you end up in a jungle.
I think it’s important to cut down what’s not needed as much as we can. I say extra as much as we can. We don’t have to start and go so far back in time that we have the next “problem”. A certain kind of minimalism is needed, at least for me. That doesn’t mean that I don’t want to use these billions of possibilities we have.
In contrary, it means that I am thankful for what we have. We are lucky to have this wonderful choice! The minimalism has to set in when we are choosing. Instead of taking all we can, which has the risk of getting lost again, we should take what we can handle.
I want to write, what I am doing here, that means I take the opportunity and use the internet for what I like to do.
I also would like to start a yoga teacher training and I could sign up right now. This opportunity is just a few clicks away. But I would not be able to succeed right now because I have a full-time job, a family with a toddler, a quite full calendar and barely time for writing and some yoga.
Do you see what I mean? I cut down and let go. That doesn’t mean this chance has passed, that means it isn’t fitting in at this moment. Once the toddler is older I may want to think about it again. Or I may have something else by then which is more important for my life at that stage. You never know where life goes. Things that were once important are vanishing from your life without leaving even traces. Sometimes it’s even enough to listen to your gut feeling.
My way is just starting. Or even better said, this journey is the destination. Not everything in your life need to hit a predefined goal!
What am I doing in general?
I don’t have a plan, that means I go by intuition which is my way. Maybe you are the same kind because I have enough pressure in my life that I cannot fully control (like work for instance), it wouldn’t feel good to put myself under another kind of pressure. For some persons that won’t work because they need a strict plan in place. This is your way to find out what’s best for you.
I made a list, my list. It is kind of a plan, that’s correct, but it’s not written in stone. This list is like a working document. I add things as they pop up and I cross out either because it’s done or because it’s not important anymore. This list has no priorities, if I have checked something on it at the end of the day, then I’m happy. If not, then it is like it is.
To be honest, for me this works best, I don’t feel depressed when this list is long because I know that nothing on that list is urgent. Everything on there will make my life less cluttered once it’s done but without any pressure behind.
My way doesn’t end here because I realized that it’s not only about minimizing what we have but also about making changes.
I used my electric toothbrush for years and would have had so many benefits in my brain to convince anyone to buy an electric brush. You don’t believe what I use now. A bamboo brush.
No plastic, no electricity, no batteries, no timer, no sounds, a simple and easy bamboo brush.
I changed! The way forward for me is not only about getting rid of things. It is also to think about what we have and how we could improve there. Not feeding the plastic industry is a good feeling! This is just a small start.
I’m far away from being perfect and there are many things where I can start to check for alternatives. There are also many things where I don’t find alternatives because I wouldn’t feel happy with the alternative. And sometimes even there simply are no alternatives. The balance is the key, as it is so often. As long as you know where to cut things down you will be fine.
Every step you make to improve your life and your environment is important. If only each person is starting we all would make a difference. Be the example and show your family, friends and neighbors what alternatives we have.
This is my way.
I just started and am happy if you share what you are doing.
Are you trying to change?
Are you living with all you need but not more?
Do you have stuffed closets and no clue what’s inside?
Are you lost in the jungle of possibilities you have?
How do you want to change your life?
Are you happy with your life as it is?
Let me know – I would love to hear your stories <3
Do we expect too much (to be happy)?
There is no correct answer to this question! But there are many examples of where we indeed expect too much or have wrong expectations.
Life is not a fairy tale and even if many are dreaming of a big love story lots of them are disappointed in the end.
The question is why.
You meet the person you fall in love with and luckily this person falls in love with you as well.
What else can we wish for?
But there it starts – we start to expect.
The romance should stay a lifetime.
I want to be treated as a princess.
The butterflies should always be there.
That won’t happen!
Do you know that you are one of the luckiest persons on earth if you fall in love and you are loved back?
So many long for this experience and will never know how it feels like!
Why do we start to destroy this love by expecting it to be like this or like that?
Our love is unique as our fingerprint and once we feel our heart beating in the same rhythm as the heart of our loved one nothing will be like it was before.
This pure luck will change us forever!
Change – yes, we do change! But we don’t change to be part of a movie romance story with a happily ever after, where everything falls into place like we wish and smells like roses and candy.
We change as we start to balance between who we are, who we are as a couple, where we want to go (alone and as a couple). There are so many questions and some of them are asked while some are considered answered already because we love each other, don’t we?
Here the first wrong expectations start to set in.
I love but how strong is this love?
Am I able to go against anything if I would have to; to save it or not?
Do I know everything about my partner or do I guess?
Just because I want to spent the rest of my life with this person and have children doesn’t mean my partner wants the same. Or maybe he wants the same but not within the same time I wish for.
Guessing is feeding my wrong expectations.
Of course “we” want to marry – that’s what couples do. Can you answer for your partner? He may have no idea that you think this way and will never ask you because he’s happy just like it is.
Love is happening. That’s correct. So why don’t we take it like it is and instead put this precious love into a time-schedule? And what would be the time-schedule?
If you feel that the love you feel is not making me happy – that’s hard but that happens because of different expectations.
The hardest is to let go!
Once you have the strength to let go and acknowledge that this love is wonderful and all you wished for, but that it wasn’t meant to be for a lifetime; only then you are able to make peace with yourself and with the person who wasn’t fulfilling what you wished for.
It’s not the task of somebody else to fulfill your desires. You are responsible to live the life you want to live. So don’t make the mistake to attach your “happy” to a person. Instead be happy together with that person as long as it lasts!
Life is never black or white. We are so unique and have millions of different thoughts and wishes and hopes; there is no right or wrong when love sets in.
Only the one who loves deeply will understand what love is.
You know what love is and you are able to love, that’s a gift.
Every love has its uniqueness – if you loved once it doesn’t mean that you will experience the same again.
I can assure you that it won’t be the same. Not because I’m a love expert but because it can never be the same.
You are a different person and the person you love is either a different one or a different person like you due to experiences made before.
I’m not talking about a certain kind of love. Even if we distinguish between the love for a partner, the love for family, the love for a child or the love for friends – they all will never be the same.
Be even more thankful when you live with your love and tell them! Go ahead and tell them how happy you are to be around them, how love is surrounding you.
Happiness in first place is always something inside of you! It can take a million people who love you, they won’t make you happy if you are not able to accept this love in your life.
I wish you a life full of love, a heart warm and happy and with lots of memories and a stomach full of butterflies. But always remember, you are the first person you need to love truly before anyone else has a chance and don’t expect them to love you in a certain way. Take them as they are and be happy!