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Thoughts On how to Behave during a Pandemic

Thoughts On how to Behave during a Pandemic from a Yoga Teacher

Thoughts On how to Behave during a Pandemic

from a Yoga Teacher

A pandemic hits everyone, yogi or not, and all of us will have a different opinion on how to behave. I’m not questioning that and I will not judge it (which is even the first point to consider).

Judging

Judging – who are we to judge? It won’t be easy not to judge, I know. It will bring us to our limits, I know. But if everyone would start with this single approach we would live more peaceful than we do right now.

Besides, this is one of the fundamental lessons in yoga. We take others as they are. You can and should be a role model but you should not judge others. Everyone walks through life and some see more obstacles along the way than others, that doesn’t make them a good or a bad human being.

Is there an influence?

I wrote “my Yoga thought”, but to understand where I come from you need to know that I’m a project manager in clinical research for a living, so both, Yoga and clinical research, play into my thinking. This is an influence I cannot deny.

And that’s the second important point. Everyone is having influences which play into our thoughts. This non-attachment is almost impossible. In yoga we talk about Aparigraha, the last Yama of Patanjali’s Eight Limbs of Yoga. Yamas are moral guidelines by which we should live with regard to our relationship with ourselves, and with the world around us. Even if I would like to step back and tell myself to think not like a project manager, my subconscious will tell me something else. So before I build my opinion I step back and put light on a thought from different angles, try to see it from the other side, try to understand where others are coming from and why people build the opinions they share.

But what about facts?

What is not deniable are facts, this is what I thought until people came along with a huge portion of mistrust. Fake data, fake news, fake here and fake there. Humans are not perfect and we all make mistakes, which is great as we learn from mistakes. It is not so great if our mistakes and doubts have an affect on others.

I still believe in facts.

Maybe I judge these facts different as someone who had his whole life nothing to do with research, but either way, a fact is a fact until proofed wrong, right?

Why do people doubt and deny facts? I guess this is the point I will never fully figure out but on my search for understanding I learned that it’s often based on their very unique personal experiences. Which is a valid reason but which is also dangerous because trying to convince someone of an opinion which may do harm in the end is simply dangerous.

Fake News

Fake news – I get it, we are small figures when it comes to politics, but where is our own logic? News may not be 100 percent correct and may try to lead us in a direction which is good for the economy, politics, higher management reasons we don’t even know, but how can I deny the pandemic state? These pictures of patients in the ICU, coffins transported away from hospitals, nurses and doctors who explain how their current work day looks like, these are facts.

I would even go ahead and call it disrespectful to deny the fact that people are dying. And there is no matter how old they are, because this is often another “argument”.

They are all old. Really?

That’s not true, and honestly, even if, do we close our eyes because the people dying are old? They could be your grandparents, parents, siblings, relatives. You really don’t care? Then the problem is deeper than you imagine.

Empathy

Non-empathy is classified as a mental disorder on the ICD-10 of mental and behavioural disorders, which means nothing else than these people have a mental illness they should work on. And that’s sad, sad that they experienced something in their life which leads them to this disorder, but it is not an excuse to harm others. We all have an individual responsibility to at least not harm others. Even if you think that you only harm yourself, that is not true. You have people around you who care and if something happens to you they will be harmed as well. We are all not alone in this life. People can argue they have nobody. Who knows if you don’t harm the people who need to look at you when you are gone? Who need to treat you when you are ill and who take stories of their patients home because they have empathy with every human being?

Helping each other, being there when someone needs you, supporting one another, all of this is what we need in a state of a pandemic. Criticism and negativity won’t help anyone.

Kindness

What do you think will succeed in the long run? I’m sure it will be kindness. Something everyone can give, you don’t need a full bank account, a big house or a fast car to be kind.

A random act of kindness lights up the day for everyone and it costs you nothing at all!

There was a really old women in the drugstore, she had problems reading with her mask on – offer help. She was so grateful and I am sure I lighted up her day a bit. Someone in front of you isn’t fast enough packing up the bought items? Be patient, it won’t take more than five minutes. Why should you ruin this persons mood and your own for this? The homeless sitting outside in winter, is there an old coat you don’t need anymore? Instead of keeping it in your wardrobe just simply do something good and give it to those in need.

Patience

Patience is a virtue, but one you can learn. We have to spend more time at home these days, why not spending them with some learning – wasn’t there something you ever wanted to learn, to read or to write? A new language, an instrument, drawing – there are so many possibilities and many of them teach us patience. No book has been written in a day or two, colour needs time to dry, the sound of music is echoing longer than we think. I like to change things always to the positive and indeed, it is not easy, but it works.

Conclusion?

My conclusion is that we all should act with more kindness and patience and I truly believe the world would be in general a better place, not only during a pandemic. Especially now we should all take a step back before we act. Many of us are stressed and if you are stressed it’s harder to reflect. We live now, this now is not easy, that’s a fact. This now is complicated in many areas but isn’t that a chance for all of us to become better persons? This Now is all we have and nobody knows what tomorrow bring, so if we would change to live more in the present moment we would start to understand that we are able to bring lots of joy in our life, even in lockdowns. I hear often that everyone lacks time. Just remember – you had time to go shopping, to meet for lunch, to do sports, to hang out with friends, alone the time you have now because you cannot do it as you are used to. Use it wisely, call friends and ask if they are ok, write letters, start a journal. If you write down your thoughts they are off your mind and give space, that’s a wonderful side effect of writing.

I just would hope that human beings start to live with more empathy and more kindness.

Ram Dass once said:

We are all just walking each other home. – Ram Dass

Let this be our theme for the future.

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Two weeks until Christmas

Two weeks until Christmas

Two weeks until Christmas

Unbelievable, isn’t it?

This year started with so many hopes and dreams… And all of a sudden we reached the end of this year.

Two weeks until Christmas literally means that I would start now to run in circles. This would be the time to go to malls, into the city, do the Christmas shopping. But instead, instead I sit here and type patiently. A hot steaming tea on my left side, part of a chocolate Santa on the right side. My husband went outside with our son, it’s just me and my thoughts.

Two weeks – normally that sounds short and like not enough time left, but this year nothing is normal. If you ask people to go two weeks into quarantine it sounds for them like a lifetime.

What happened this year seems like a massive slow down

A slow down with different names. Call it lockdown, partly lock down, quarantine or light lockdown. In the end all had the very same effect, they slowed down our life. And sure, you can start now to complain. It took the economy down, many people struggle, that is correct. What is also correct is that complaining will not change that. I don’t want to focus on the bad and rather focus on the positive. There are lots of positive effects all this had. You need to open your eyes and your mind and I am sure you will start to see them.

This has nothing to do with a pandemic induced slowing down but it may help anyone to see what you can do to slow down in a healthy way.

Enjoying Life in the Slow Lane

Going from 100 to 0 is by far not an easy task and I can tell you from my own experience that it needs strengths. Sounds strange, right. Many people think as soon as you slow down you are completely relaxed. It would be nice but unfortunately it is not like that.

Slowing down is a process of learning.

Many people cannot let go of their routine, of their “how things should be” and doing nothing is harder than some can imagine. It’s also for a reason that many are falling into a depression once they are retired, life was busy and all of sudden there seems to be nothing. And this void needs to be filled, but how. Adjusting to a slower lifestyle takes time and exercise as everything else in life. Finding out what you need, what you want, what are the things that make you happy, all of this is new.

And one other thing just before I start to get comments on how privileged I am. Yes, I agree and I am fully aware of that. I know that my position here is not one which has been affected and shattered my life, but many who are able to sit down and read this blog are in a similar position, right. I don’t deny all the tragedies, but I barely believe that people who are affected beyond imagination will sit peacefully in front of a web device and read my words.

So, what are the positive effects?

Focussing on one self is something fully positive. Do you know who you are? Who are you besides your profession, besides your role as partner, parent, sibling, or whatever it is. Who are YOU? What makes YOU happy?

We all focus lots on what others expect from us, how we should be in this life. I think the first step is learning to let go of these expectations and focussing on your own self.

Train yourself to let go…

Once this is accomplished as first step you may surrender into the slow pace of your life and find out what you want. Mindfulness and gratefulness are two big words, and they are so important to find your way. See what you achieved already, be thankfully for all the opportunities you had in your life so far. Instead of running and starting something new take care of yourself. Self-Care is often so underestimated although it is definitely very important. Only if you are properly taken care of you will have the strength, the power, the endurance to start something new.

The Importance of Self-care…

I’m at the verge of going into another stage and although I think that my prior job has been purposeful I am thirsty for something with even more depth.

Turning inward

These times are times where we all have more time than we ever thought to focus on where we are, what we want and how we want to move forward. The pandemic is a huge change in everyones life, why don’t we start to embrace the possibilities instead of focussing on the restrictions?

A mind can never be restricted, which is good and dangerous at the same time.

I would like to hear all the positive things that happened to you, what did you learn, what has been accomplished, what makes you happy?

For me, I can truly say we have such an exclusive family time – seeing our son growing is a gift and we can focus better as we don’t hurry from here to there. Our eating behaviour changed for the good. We always loved home cooked meals, but with less shopping and more planning it turned into a more local and sustainable direction. Neighbours are supporting each other more than before. We discover the nature around us with different eyes. We have time to read, to be creative, to do what we love together.

Everything in life has two sides – focus on the good! And of course stay healthy. Namaste

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World Peace – wouldn’t it be great?

World Peace – wouldn’t it be great?

But if I look around we are further away from it than ever before.

The freedom the internet gives us is taking the peace away.

This sentence is on point – we are so free in this century than never before but instead of using this freedom wisely it is abused. People are hiding behind their mobile devices and hit other with words, written out, stamped and traceable, the seem to be fearless in the sanctuary of their own home.

I love to reach many people across the globe with what I write here but if I check social media it also scares me. For almost every news line you read you find comments below which are hard to take in. Many are so awfully beyond what is considered respectful that I wonder what monsters hide behind these profiles.

Online disinhibition effect

Have we lost the ability of being empathic?

A mother loses her child – comments start from “why didn’t she watch her child better” and end with “She doesn’t deserve to be called mother”.

People in an ICU were burned to death due to a fire breakout in the hospital track – comments are “You see, with the flu symptoms you better would have stayed at home instead of calling it Covid-19 and blocking the ICUs” or “who cares, their own fault”.

A new Corona-Hotspot has been named and one of the first comments is “Why don’t the finally stop to let immigrants in, the borders should be closed” – this is so completely out of context.

I’m just sitting and staring at the screen, wondering when all of this happened.

A major shift in society does not happen over night.

It is like a disease, slowly entering every space. These “monsters” start to reveal their faces when going out on the streets, we have seen it several times. I’ve never heard about so many demonstrations before against the government than in 2020. Especially when it would be the time to stay at home they start to show up in masses outside.

If we want peace, the start should be within us! If we want freedom, we should not try to take freedom away from others. It is just a simple game, only do to others what you want others to do to yourself. Do I want to be attacked by strangers because of my mindset? Surely not! So why would I attack someone who is different than I?

Spirituality is abused instead of being lived.

When it comes to spirituality many people claim it for themselves, as if they own it, as if they are the incarnation of wisdom. If you are a spiritual person, then you don’t fight for it! You live it because you want to go ahead and be a role model for others.

Don’t give others the soil to plant their faulty seeds!

Smile and step away. Know when it is worth to explain your side but also know when it is completely senseless. Being quiet sometimes means being wise and not getting involved in the drama. I’m a person who loves to “correct” if I see false assumptions but I also know how to take care of my mind and soul. The more I get involved with stubborn people, the more my energy levels disappear. I don’t want to feel depressed because of what others think? Their drama is not my cup of tea, instead I rather drink a cup of tea in peace and surround myself with the positive things life has in store for us.

Positive thoughts are essential for happiness!

With all the bad news and craziness around us, we can learn to see the positive and once we change our mindset we start to be happier. You cannot change the world, no, but you can change your world and the more you change the more others see that it works.

To live peacefully is our right and we are the first person to be in charge of it. Only when you change profoundly to the good you can start to see the good in every situation.

Let’s be the best versions of ourself and start this wave of positive thoughts.

What if we comment on each and every bad comment we read something nice?

Let’s start a wave of positivity rolling over the web – there must be more people out there who are compassionate and empathic and nice than the ones who are not.

For every nice reply to a mean comment add the hashtag #BeThePeaceYouWantToSee Who is with me? I can’t take it any longer that mean and harsh comments remain uncommented and instead of starting war we just are as we would all to be, peaceful and positive!

I never ask you to share something – this time I ask you – please do us all a favour and share, the more who participate the more we reach together.

Thanks so much <3 Namaste & stay safe

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Children are the future – unless we need to do something important…

Children are the future – unless we need to do something important…

Children are the future - unless we need to do something important...

Yes, the headline is meant exactly like that and unfortunately this is often the truth!

My son is three years old and he is in daycare since he was 14 months old.

Has this been my choice?

Yes and no.

To afford our life we had no other option and yes, we could have moved to a village where life is cheaper and reduce the hours at daycare but then we would stop our careers. It is a balance of what we want for our child and our life and our job.

Last week the kindergarten has been closed for a day and we knew this for a while to arrange this day differently. Planning Always works fine for us.

But last week he started on exactly that day to have  fever and a starting cough.

What do working parents now?

It has not been a question at all that he stays at home and that I am with him (simply because it’s easier in my job). A couple of days later I went with him to the paediatrician because he was still not as fine as we hoped for after the weekend. No more fever but not as active and happy as we know him. He still barely ate and that was very unusual for him.

The eye opener for this post happened there, at his paediatrician.

He fully checked him, asked what happened up to that day and then recommended how to move forward.

The recommendation was as follows:

“Your son has a cold, keep an eye on his ears and his throat because it’s slightly inflamed, it may fade as it seems as if he went already through the worst part but it may worsen as well and then please come back.

For the cough he gets a medication for the night so be sleeps well and recovers, throughout the day please give him lots of tea and honey, fluids are important and not too much action.”

OK, sounded like a plan and I was guessing the same before (mother’s instinct?). Before I left I just asked the following question out of curiosity: “When will he be allowed to go back to the kindergarten?”

Answer: “As he’s free of fever for two days already you can bring him tomorrow, if you have the possibity to keep him at home for another one to two day even better.”

I am in the lucky position to be able to keep him at home and did that until he was entirely fine (which turned out not to be after 1 to 2 but after 4 days at home).  But what about parents who are not able to do that?

What about…

What about all the people out there who are frightened of losing their job if they stay at home, who are paid per hour and need each cent to afford the minimum standard of living, who are single parents, who have nobody around like grandparents, … there will be many scenarios which happen daily and which cause children to be in their daycare even though not fully recovered and healthy.

Just imagine:

Imagine you are this child, you don’t feel well and your safest place is the lap of your mom or dad, resting your head on their chest listening to their heartbeat, your sweetest lullaby, and feeling simply a bit better because of the warmth and smell and love you know since you are alive. This is your place to fully relax and let go and surrender. But what happens is that instead you need to visit a place you know very well but it’s loud and children are asking if you want to play, your nose runs but nobody realizes instantly, you don’t feel fine but you try to smile throughout the day. 

You are just three years old, this is not what you should learn, how to pretend to feel good, you should be where you indeed would feel as good as you can while being still a bit ill.

How do you feel now?

If I see how often my son comes to snuggle for no visible reason when he’s not fully fine I just can imagine how he would feel all alone in the kindergarten on a day like that.  He starts to cry for things which normally don’t bother him, I know he would not cry there.

I know that he would not be “all alone” but it’s like standing in a crowd and feeling like the lonliest person on earth.

My heart truly aches if I think what he would need to go through and then I wonder if it would be worth it? As written, some cannot choose and I appreciate it BUT, and there is a really HUGE but to this whole topic.

It is us to raise awareness and speak up.

There are many parents out there where one parent stays at home and the most interesting part now is the following. Very often the parent’s who could not afford it stay with their children until they are recovered while the ones who could do so simply prefer to be somewhere else…brunching with friends, going to the gym, the long scheduled hair dresser appointment,….

I just want to ask all of you – please be responsible, take care of this little soul, children can feel abandoned quickly and in such cases they are even totally right to feel so. What matters most is not the happy employer or the well done hair, what matters most is that our children are as well as they deserve to be. 

We have chosen to be parents, care-takers (maybe the better word here) – it is our duty to be there when they need us most! 

We don’t want to raise a generation of people who don’t know that it means to be taken care of and who think it’s normal to be at work not feeling well. A generation of pretenders, is this what we want? Surely not, at least not for me.

We are the basis they build up their life on. Don’t let this be shattered to pieces – our health is the most important – all we are is connected to how we feel.

Worth sharing?

If you agree please be so kind and share, comment, spread this message – we are responsible for the future and we need to take ownership here! 

Sending love <3

 

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Do we lose sight of what really counts?

Recently I have the feeling as if nothing seems to be important anymore except of “standing out of the crowd” or “being exceptional” or also “being utterly successful”.

Is this really all that matters? Why are we live through our jobs instead of bringing our personality into work? Counted as numbers and cherished only when achievements are visible.

Corporate life is seriously making me tired and let me wonder what I can change to be more mindful and more human in what I’m doing.

My recent job is project manager in a quite big research company, but the truth is, it doesn’t matter if I’m a manager or a worker, I need to fulfill my job obligations like everyone else. The only difference is that I wonder if I’m in a position to change things profoundly, because this is what it would need to make me happy with what I’m doing.

I work with a team, several teams on different projects, and I’m supposed to manage the project which also means to manage the team. It’s getting harder to do this recently because we are put under pressure from so many different angles that I already struggle and I’m in this position quite a while and know how to distinguish between important and not important. The trend is to focus on the not important because a few upper management people sat together and thought they need more oversight and so they set goals for them internally and to meet these metrics we need to report.

Of course there is a need of oversight and I fully understand this need, but what I don’t understand is how the priority setting can drift so far away from our job?

If I should give you an example – you are working with animals and the utmost importance lays on the health of these animals then what would you rather do? Go to the office and calculate how much you paid for food for the past 6 months in order to be prepared to justify in case someone would ask you in a couple of months OR take care of the current situation where an animal is sick and urgently needs a vet to check on its health?

You see what I’m talking about?

We run reports, we fill in excel sheets, we sit in conference calls almost 60% of our time, we ensure that all metrics look awesome but at the end of the day we forgot what we are actually working on.

The worst time eaters are meetings, and again, of course there are meetings that make a change but be honest, in most meeting we have throughout a week we aren’t productive. We talk about work that has been completed (which obviously could be shared in an email), we talk about where we are on this day (which is OK in meeting one of a week) and we talk about what we need to do to reach goals. But instead of staring to work on these goals we jump right into the next meeting, and the next, and the next, and then it’s 2 pm and we completely forgot to have lunch but cannot go anyway because we have to use the one-hour time-slot before the next meeting to actually work.

I have many colleagues with families and children, and also those without, one thing is equal for all of us at the end of the day when we are exhausted in our own home falling asleep early because we know what awaits us the next day at work: We start to wonder if we work for a living or live to work.

The answer is clear for me. I work for a living, this is not a question at all, but I also realize more and more that I want to see a change – be it a major shift of my personal work life or be it a major shift of valuing employees in the company I’m working for.

We all know these workaholics and we will never change their perception, that’s fine, but we need a change for the rest. I want to be able to focus on priorities and I want these priorities to be the humans, the clients who pay in the end and the purpose of each project I’m working on. I don’t want internal administration to take all this away from me for the sake of having vice presidents eating salmon tartes at a meeting somewhere to praise themselves.

I want colleagues who love their job and not colleagues who struggle to get their work done because its simply too much.

I want also healthy people around me and not people who drag themselves sick into offices because they are scared to lose their job.

I want to have working hours flexible but respected, I don’t want to receive meeting invites for 8 pm my time just because others are too ignorant to realize that they are in a different time zone.

I want managers who care about their people and wish them a well-deserved weekend instead of asking them on a Friday noon for some extra work.

Do I want far too much? I don’t think so because it’s known that happy people are more productive than unhappy people. So hey, companies out there, what are you waiting for?

It’s not really too complicate to make employees happy.

Provide them with a proper workplace

Ensure they have coffee, tea and water supply

Offer them a time to have lunch

Allow them to take their work home when needed

Be as flexible as you expect it from your employee

Ensure they can handle the amount of work within their scheduled work time

Show them that you support families

Give them a bonus work good work

This list could go on but I hope you realize what I mean – I did not even add the high salary because not everything is about money. Of course we want to be paid properly for our work (and it would be nice if women finally can be paid equally rather sooner than later) but what we want is a work place that appreciates US and is not treating us like a number in the system. We can only be good at work if we feel good, if we are healthy, if we are supported when needed.

I see people quitting to go into lower paid jobs to stay mentally sane – honestly, this is where we need a shift! It can’t be that companies lose good people because they don’t care about their people.

I’m furious if I hear these stories and then I realize that one day I may be the one who quits because I cannot handle the amount of stress anymore. Recently a 6 months vacation sounds like paradise for me and I bet I wouldn’t miss a day at work. That’s sad because it’s well known that people who love their job are doing them better than people who don’t.

Change to more humanity, change and make all of us happy because I promise you will see results after a short time – not because we run like hamsters in a wheel but because the more focused we work the better the results will be – EVERYWHERE!

LoVe from misssfaith

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One month is gone

One month is gone already – it’s February!

We are getting closer to the renewal time of spring. How lovely is alone this thought.

Are you also tired of winter?

In general I like winter, if it would be the winter we all dream of. Snowy landscapes, cosy homes, steaming tea cups, children building a snowman…

The problem is that my winter doesn’t look like that. Whenever we would have time for these real snow days there is no more snow but grey mud or even worse just rain.

The first time my son was on his new slide was the last so far because since then there either was no snow or in the snow regions it was so much that they called out the emergency status. That means we have a new slide, a new snow suit, even wonderful warm boots but no snow.

The same goes for the snowman. As wonderful as a winter could be, this winter wasn’t showing up like we wished (at least not in Munich).

Others may say now that this isn’t entirely true, and they are right. The winter for us wasn’t like we wished for. We work from Monday to Friday and only the weekend is the time where we could fully enjoy the winter-wonderland. If we would have had time throughout the week our feeling towards this winter would be different.

As always in life it’s the personal perception.

I’m not complaining, we are fine, we won’t break into tears because of these missed snowportunities 🙂

The interesting part is indeed how different we all see things.

My husband is Libyan, for him everything under 0°C is too cold to go outside unless you have to. For me, I like the warm days more but it’s OK if it’s cold. I learned there is no wrong weather, there are only wrong clothes, that’s the way to handle the weather in Germany. And our son? With almost three years he is simply exploring the world. If it’s cold or warm, dry or wet, lighted up or dark, he will always find something on every single day that is interesting.

January

We started into this year with a month full of snow, rain, grey days and a bit of winter sun. The first half of January was a re-adjusting at work for me. Even if the break between Christmas and the new year is just a couple of days it seems as everyone is starting new and not too stressed into another year. The second half took the speed up again and currently I ask myself how to survive a full year with this level of stress.

What comes next?

The simple answer would be February.

I know that my work life will change a bit in the next months as projects are closed and new are starting. I hope there will be more time again to focus on my development, professional as well as private.

As days start to be longer again we will wait patiently for the spring to spend more and more time outside. The lack of sunshine is draining the last depots. Even better to have the possibility to plan a short vacation before the long summer vacation this year.

Travelling with a toddler is not pure relaxation but indeed a wonderful experience. We plan another flight with him in March and look already forward to new discoveries.

Apart from that I guess the only plan is to enjoy more and worry less.

People tend to be stressed 24/7

Going back to what really counts in life is one of the keys to happiness. Our jobs are eating lots of time and if we don’t work we worry about work. That’s not how it’s supposed to be. Once you are out of the office you should start to enjoy your private leisure time. Somehow many forgot how it works.

We don’t live to work until we die. The purpose in life should be greater and bigger than heading to work and be a good employee, employer, boss, manager, consultant, sales assistant, truck driver, whatever you work. Where are the happy men and women, mothers and fathers, sisters and brothers, wives and husbands, cousins, artists, dancers, hippies, all these who don’t have places in their work?

At work I am a manager but the rest of my life I am a woman, a mom, a wife, a yogi, a painter, a cook, an artist, a writer, a blogger, a psychologist, a healer and so much more. I need this work-free time to be happy in everything else that I’m here for and being stressed because of my job should not have a place there. Not I, neither my husband nor my son deserve to be surrounded by a stressed person.

We need to let go

It’s hard to let go and just be. I know because I’m not good at it but I try. I will never stop trying to let go as it is one important part for my own sanity.

One month is already gone. Eleven more will follow until we reach 2020 and what do we want to remember? The sleepless nights of worry, the break-downs of being over-worked, the mistakes we made?

No, we want to remember the lessons learned, the laughter, the love that surrounded us. We want to remember the good time which was more than the bad time. To reach this we have to let go and that means to shift our focus. At work my focus is on my work but as soon as I shut down my laptop and turn off my phone the focus is on me and my family – that’s where it belongs to.

I wish you all a shift of your own personal focus. Let go of what isn’t needed at all and minimize the stress as best as you can.

Months are passing by so fast – we need to cherish the time we have!

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Less is more – my way to minimalism

Less is more – my way to minimalism

Minimalism is something I like so much. It gives you room, space, air – open spaces are a symbol of liberty.

How to start and apply this minimalism in a small flat which once was a single home? Now this is the home of our family, means my son, my husband and me and a change is needed.

The more we have the unhappier we are?

This sentence is partly true.

I am de-cluttering, everything, every tiny space in the house will be turned upside down. While doing this I start to realize how many things we have, how many unused items, how much of what doesn’t make us happier because most of it is hidden behind doors, in the back of an wardrobe buried under something else.

What do we use and wear frequently, what do we use and wear from time to time, what do we use and wear never?

Sorting out makes me feel good. This act of letting go is not only sorting my wardrobe but also sorting my life.

How much do you have in your life that doesn’t make you happy?

Have you ever thought about it?

We live in an overflow of possibilities.

How many white shirts does one single person need? Seriously, even if you wear them 24/7, even if you change it twice a day – the amount of clothes in my wardrobe isn’t to be justified. Not even if I try to find an excuse.

This overflow is present wherever we go. I think we are a generation with an amount of choices that is hard to handle, especially when someone has not yet developed a certain kind of confidence.

If your path in life is not yet clear and you are searching for your personal way you will find thousands of possibilities and you end up in a jungle.

The importance of going back to the roots

I think it’s important to cut down what’s not needed as much as we can. I say extra as much as we can. We don’t have to start and go so far back in time that we have the next “problem”. A certain kind of minimalism is needed, at least for me. That doesn’t mean that I don’t want to use these billions of possibilities we have.

In contrary, it means that I am thankful for what we have. We are lucky to have this wonderful choice! The minimalism has to set in when we are choosing. Instead of taking all we can, which has the risk of getting lost again, we should take what we can handle.

I want to write, what I am doing here, that means I take the opportunity and use the internet for what I like to do.

I also would like to start a yoga teacher training and I could sign up right now. This opportunity is just a few clicks away. But I would not be able to succeed right now because I have a full-time job, a family with a toddler, a quite full calendar and barely time for writing and some yoga.

Do you see what I mean? I cut down and let go. That doesn’t mean this chance has passed, that means it isn’t fitting in at this moment. Once the toddler is older I may want to think about it again. Or I may have something else by then which is more important for my life at that stage. You never know where life goes. Things that were once important are vanishing from your life without leaving even traces. Sometimes it’s even enough to listen to your gut feeling.

My way

My way is just starting. Or even better said, this journey is the destination. Not everything in your life need to hit a predefined goal!

What am I doing in general?

I don’t have a plan, that means I go by intuition which is my way. Maybe you are the same kind because I have enough pressure in my life that I cannot fully control (like work for instance), it wouldn’t feel good to put myself under another kind of pressure. For some persons that won’t work because they need a strict plan in place. This is your way to find out what’s best for you.

I made a list, my list. It is kind of a plan, that’s correct, but it’s not written in stone. This list is like a working document. I add things as they pop up and I cross out either because it’s done or because it’s not important anymore. This list has no priorities, if I have checked something on it at the end of the day, then I’m happy. If not, then it is like it is.

To be honest, for me this works best, I don’t feel depressed when this list is long because I know that nothing on that list is urgent. Everything on there will make my life less cluttered once it’s done but without any pressure behind.

Let go AND change

My way doesn’t end here because I realized that it’s not only about minimizing what we have but also about making changes.

I used my electric toothbrush for years and would have had so many benefits in my brain to convince anyone to buy an electric brush. You don’t believe what I use now. A bamboo brush.

No plastic, no electricity, no batteries, no timer, no sounds, a simple and easy bamboo brush.

Does it make me happy? Yes!!!

I changed! The way forward for me is not only about getting rid of things. It is also to think about what we have and how we could improve there. Not feeding the plastic industry is a good feeling! This is just a small start.

I’m far away from being perfect and there are many things where I can start to check for alternatives. There are also many things where I don’t find alternatives because I wouldn’t feel happy with the alternative. And sometimes even there simply are no alternatives. The balance is the key, as it is so often. As long as you know where to cut things down you will be fine.

Every step you make to improve your life and your environment is important. If only each person is starting we all would make a difference. Be the example and show your family, friends and neighbors what alternatives we have.

This is my way.

I just started and am happy if you share what you are doing.

What about you?

Are you trying to change?

Are you living with all you need but not more?

Do you have stuffed closets and no clue what’s inside?

Are you lost in the jungle of possibilities you have?

How do you want to change your life?

Are you happy with your life as it is?

Let me know – I would love to hear your stories <3

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Do we expect too much (to be happy)?

Do we expect too much (to be happy)?

do we expect too much (to be happy)

There is no correct answer to this question! But there are many examples of where we indeed expect too much or have wrong expectations.

Life is not a fairy tale and even if many are dreaming of a big love story lots of them are disappointed in the end.

The question is why.

You meet the person you fall in love with and luckily this person falls in love with you as well.

What else can we wish for?

But there it starts – we start to expect.

The romance should stay a lifetime.

I want to be treated as a princess.

The butterflies should always be there.

That won’t happen!

Do you know that you are one of the luckiest persons on earth if you fall in love and you are loved back?

So many long for this experience and will never know how it feels like!

Why do we start to destroy this love by expecting it to be like this or like that?

Our love is unique as our fingerprint and once we feel our heart beating in the same rhythm as the heart of our loved one nothing will be like it was before.

This pure luck will change us forever!

Change – yes, we do change! But we don’t change to be part of a movie romance story with a happily ever after, where everything falls into place like we wish and smells like roses and candy.

We change as we start to balance between who we are, who we are as a couple, where we want to go (alone and as a couple). There are so many questions and some of them are asked while some are considered answered already because we love each other, don’t we?

Here the first wrong expectations start to set in.

I love but how strong is this love?

Am I able to go against anything if I would have to; to save it or not?

Do I know everything about my partner or do I guess?

Just because I want to spent the rest of my life with this person and have children doesn’t mean my partner wants the same. Or maybe he wants the same but not within the same time I wish for.

Guessing is feeding my wrong expectations.

Of course “we” want to marry – that’s what couples do. Can you answer for your partner? He may have no idea that you think this way and will never ask you because he’s happy just like it is.

Love is happening. That’s correct. So why don’t we take it like it is and instead put this precious love into a time-schedule? And what would be the time-schedule?

If you feel that the love you feel is not making me happy – that’s hard but that happens because of different expectations.

The hardest is to let go!

Once you have the strength to let go and acknowledge that this love is wonderful and all you wished for, but that it wasn’t meant to be for a lifetime; only then you are able to make peace with yourself and with the person who wasn’t fulfilling what you wished for.

It’s not the task of somebody else to fulfill your desires. You are responsible to live the life you want to live. So don’t make the mistake to attach your “happy” to a person. Instead be happy together with that person as long as it lasts!

Life is never black or white. We are so unique and have millions of different thoughts and wishes and hopes; there is no right or wrong when love sets in.

  • Be thankful!
  • Be thankful for this fast beating heart and the butterflies in your stomach.
  • Be thankful for the memories you have, for this warm feeling in your heart when you remember how love feels.
  • Be thankful for the time, for the emotions, for the heartache.
  • Be thankful for raw pure moments of total bliss.
  • Be thankful for a heart wide open, letting love flow as if there’s no tomorrow.
  • Also be thankful for the heartache, for the grief and tears when a love ended.

Only the one who loves deeply will understand what love is.

You know what love is and you are able to love, that’s a gift.

Every love has its uniqueness – if you loved once it doesn’t mean that you will experience the same again.

I can assure you that it won’t be the same. Not because I’m a love expert but because it can never be the same.

You are a different person and the person you love is either a different one or a different person like you due to experiences made before.

I’m not talking about a certain kind of love. Even if we distinguish between the love for a partner, the love for family, the love for a child or the love for friends – they all will never be the same.

Be even more thankful when you live with your love and tell them! Go ahead and tell them how happy you are to be around them, how love is surrounding you.

Happiness in first place is always something inside of you! It can take a million people who love you, they won’t make you happy if you are not able to accept this love in your life.

I wish you a life full of love, a heart warm and happy and with lots of memories and a stomach full of butterflies. But always remember, you are the first person you need to love truly before anyone else has a chance and don’t expect them to love you in a certain way. Take them as they are and be happy!

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Why being an egoist isn’t always bad

Nobody will tell you to take care of yourself!
Your life – your responsibility

Why being an egoist isn’t always bad

We are growing up learning to take care of one another and to share, which in general is great, but what nobody is telling us along the way is that we will face times where nobody will take care of you.

We should not act egoistic, being an egoist is bad – we are bad if we are an egoist. While I partly agree, because I’d love to see non-egoists everywhere, I partly disagree quite strong.

To put myself behind is something which is valuable in many ways, if I stand up for elder persons and offer them my seat for instance. I can start and collect many examples why it’s good to think about others. The main problem is that it will not work out 100% because nobody is perfect and social and caring like I would like them to be.

To be a caring person is wonderful as long as it’s not affecting my own sanity and here the egoist has to step in.

Only if I take care about myself, if I give myself enough time to rest, to recover, to grow, to meditate, to move, to think, to whatever makes you feel good – only then I have the strength to be there when others need me. Center yourself exactly where you are!

We are often truly exchangeable – which is not nice but sadly the reality.

If I just think about work-life, be it my own or everyone else’s, every single one of us can be exchanged within the blink of an eye. The world isn’t stopping just because I’m not there anymore. Even if many think that they are very important especially in their professional life, I can assure you, YOU ARE NOT!

A waitress is kicked out and the next is starting right away, of course that can work, you think if you are the vice president of a large traditional family business and nobody can replace you? From whom did you take over? There will always be someone coming after and that’s life, nothing is permanent.

Knowing this and knowing that I can only be the best version of myself if I take care of myself taught me to step back if I need to. I worked through many “just a small” colds instead of going on sick leave and recover properly before being back at work. NOBODY will say thanks for that and that’s good because only then you learn what’s important.

No work is more important than my health. Only if I’m healthy I can work.

So here we are – if I answer the phone with a croaky voice being obviously not healthy not many will ask you to go to the doctor and stay in bed. Many will ask you with the pity in their voices if you don’t feel fine but will switch in the next second to tasks that need to be done.

Be an egoist and RECOVER properly, long-term this is the only possibility to stay healthy and maybe to reach the change you want to see in this society.

What about invisible problems? A croaky voice, ok, but if you have mental illnesses it’s not even visible. You will tell me now that you are happy about that fact but that’s wrong.

I would love to invent something like a face turning pink-striped when having mental health issues not to put the spotlight on that person but to raise awareness of how many people are affected. This taboo needs to be broken and people should be treated properly as if they have a broken leg. It may take longer, yes, but it’s as important as any other illness to be cured!

I seriously don’t want to stamp persons as sick but I am sure that many are not asking for help or are going to get help themselves because this stamp “crazy” is still so active in our society. If you are not visibly ill then what? You have a day where you don’t feel fine, that’s normal. If it’s more than one day, then pull yourself together, it’s easy like that, isn’t it?

No, it isn’t and everyone who thinks it is has luckily never experienced mental health issues!

So please, don’t be shy, don’t be ashamed, don’t feel ‘not normal’ or crazy – there is help out there and please reach for it!

There is slowly a re-thinking on it’s way in our society but it needs people to go out and to show their pink-striped faces, people to say “Yes, I have problems”, people to assure that it is nothing to be afraid of! I promise you, if we really would put stripes in our faces the ones without would even be in the minority.

To reach a change we need to start.

Be the change you want to see…

Be an egoist and take care of yourself!!!

(Because nothing is permanent 🙂 )

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Center Yourself exactly where you are…

Center Yourself exactly where you are…

That’s your starting point – being aware of where you are right now is the most important to start moving.

If you want to go into the Yoga tree you need to make sure you know the floor you are standing on. Is it uneven, do you stumble, are there stones, is it possible to slip? Only when you know where you stand you can lift up one leg and still stand steady.

The very same counts for everything in your life – only when we are fully aware of the NOW we are confident to step forward.

Center yourself, listen, feel, breathe – all that you are right now is important. This brings you not only mindfully into the present, it grounds you and makes you completely aware of what you need right now.

If I know where I am I can start going without being afraid to get lost – I will find my way back if needed. But if I’m lost I may not find what I’m looking for because I have no idea where to head to. This may be fine, we all know that often out of these lost times something great emerges. BUT to grasp the greatness that approaches I need to see it. Most probably I won’t realize what’s in front of me when I am not centered and grounded.

When we want to drive somewhere with our car we need to make sure each time that we have fuel and that we have the keys to ignite the engine – without we won’t go anywhere.

When we wake up in the morning we need to ignite our life flame. What are we burning for, do we have enough energy (fuel) for what we want to reach? These questions are important to stay sane.

In my lowest low period I may not start to move mountains but I may be creative and work in silence. On my highest high I may be overflowing with energy and may not bundle it to quiet my mind for something that needs lots of concentration but I may be able to physically work on something, flow through a powerful day or lift other up in being full of positivity.

We have all in us, from the lowest low to the highest high and so many stages in between that we need to adjust.

If we try to go against the nature of our being we will long-term ruin ourselves. That’s why it’s important to check on ourselves and even if our day starts powerful we may slip into a low throughout the day, then take a moment and re-adjust.

The power of mindfulness is so so so damn important if we want to stay healthy and sane! We are workers and doers, we are mothers and fathers, wives and husbands, cleaners and cooks, drivers and guides. We are so much and nobody will tell you to take a minute and listen into yourself while doing all those tasks day in and day out.

We are responsible to be mindful with our life, with our body and soul. We need to listen and accept, the accepting part is often the hardest. We listen, and we know it’s time to stop. But we often ignore this inner voice and risk our well-being instead of adjusting to what we are right here and right now.

Self-care! At the end of the day it’s our own responsibility to take care of ourselves. In low and in high times, in happiness and in sadness, all these times are important; only if we embrace the low and trust that we will be fine again we will be able to embrace the high.

There is no always happy life and even if it seems sometimes so from an outside position we need to trust that all that happens is important. We only grow, and we even grow more during the low times than during the high ones. Many creative minds worked on their masterpieces while being deeply sad or broken – this doesn’t mean that we need to like these times, but we need to love ourselves even more then.

Only if we accept that we are all, all the emotions and feelings that run through us, only then we will be able to create a life we want to live. And even then we will have times where we would like to bury our heads under the blanket and that’s OK! That’s what life is all about – learning, feeling, growing, loving, enjoying, crying, teaching, sharing. Take all and embrace the whole.

Center Yourself exactly where you are…

…because you are worth it, you are deserving it and you are in charge of your life. Take care!

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Every year we start again…

Every year we start again…

…and write down new year’s resolutions, we think what we could do better than last year, what we could change, what was good and what wasn’t a masterpiece at all.

And every year I am wondering why we are doing it…

I never set new years resolutions for myself – the typical ones are to eat less sweets, stop smoking, loosing weight, etc. and I have seen to often that all those weren’t met anyway.

Are we too weak or do people just set the wrong goals? I believe it’s the later.

When I want to reach a goal it doesn’t matter if I write it down on 31st Dec or on any other day. If I want it desperately then I will work on it.

If I don’t want it desperately, then no date will help me to reach it and that’s why so many great resolutions never become real.

Why don’t we change this habit to reflect each day on where we are and what we want. This is a routine with more depth than a once-per-year kind of deep thought. I take a certain time just for myself and reflect the past 24 hours.

  • Am I happy?
  • What was good today?
  • What was not so could and how can I change it?
  • What’s my plan for the next days?
  • Do I need something that can help me?
  • Am I treating myself with love?

There are so many questions I can ask myself at the end of the day or in the morning of a new day – these are just a few examples.

Life is complicated enough so we should not start to make it more complicated with setting goals we are not able to reach, this is just frustrating and will bring us down. What we need are things that lift us up, goals which are realistic, people who support us, dreams to catch…

I miss my Yoga and instead of writing down that I want to take 15 min. per day to do some Yoga I stand up and do some sun salutations right here and right now. I can write in my journal “8 sun salutations” and that feels good!

Yesterday I wrote on Instagram the following: Be simply happy is often the most complicated

This sentence has so much to say and but is also so simple to follow. It’s saying nothing more than be simple and live now! We tend to over-do, over-plan, over-think, over-write, over-talk instead of doing what we want to do.

I am one of them, I’m maybe the best worst example for that because I over-think literally EVERYTHING. I try to reach a perfection instead of just taking the moment and that all with knowing very well that nothing is perfect and that imperfection is even more interesting than something that seems to be perfect. I struggle as we all struggle and that’s why it is even more important to remind me and all that we are not here to be perfect.

We should be happy, we should love and smile and enjoy and treat us well.

At the end of our life nobody will remember the perfect house, the neat clothes, the combed hair, the clean windows or the success at work. At the end all that counts are all those imperfect happy moments we spent.

Instead of running after imaginary goals start and live now!

Stand up wherever you are right now, look up, breathe, reach your arms up high and embrace all the beauty around you. This life is wonderful if we let it be…

<3

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Six years ago…

Six years ago...

Six years ago…

Six years ago I would’ve never pictured my life the way it is now.

Six years ago I planned my first single vacation in Italy

Six years ago I tried to become happy again just on my own and with myself.

Six years ago I was far away from thinking about my own wedding.

Six years ago I was not thinking that a man would step into my life and turn it upside down so quickly.

Six years ago I wasn’t even aware where exactly Libya is on the map (I knew Northern Africa, but that’s all I knew).

Six years ago I wasn’t able to touch my toes easily.

Six years ago I never imagined myself being a yogi.

Six years ago I never thought that I will have my own blog.

Six years ago I tried to get more balance in my life.

Six years ago I wouldn’t have cooked lamb meat.

Six years ago I thought Prada shoes are what I desperately need.

Six years ago my life was completely different.

Six years ago I had not the slightest idea of how wonderful motherhood feels like.

Six years ago I didn’t know that I would have a sweet family of three in a few years.

Six years ago I had no idea where Libya is.

Six years ago I just wanted to put my head under the blanket and wait for better times.

Six years ago I told myself I had to look up again.

Six years ago I thought all doors are closed.

Six years ago I wasn’t able to imagine how loved I will be six years later.

Six years ago are thankful six years ago and there were so so so many lessons learned since then. Life changes and so did I – taking a step back to see where I am today is good. I look back and am thankful, thankful of how it all turned out, thankful of the past, thankful of each single tear, thankful of being strong enough to change what can be changed and thankful that I am today right here, right now.

How was your life six years ago?

Greetings from the past but living and loving the now from misssfaith

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Who am I

Crazy days of motherhood (2)

Who am I and where am I is maybe the better title.

I am just sitting here in a quiet flat (if you can ignore the washing machine and dryer in the background), my son sleeps and my husband is at work.

It’s Saturday afternoon and I have finally time just for myself.

The whole week was insanely busy – our bathroom is renewed which means that we had workers in the flat EACH day and really EARLY in the morning.

As a home office worker that’s great because you don’t have to leave them unattended, but honestly, no bathroom is a nightmare and strangers in the flat as well.

The whole week I was rushing my son in the morning to the kita, followed by a day of work and answering questions like “where is the heater”, “why wasn’t that done years ago” and “where do you want the towel holder”. When I finished work I rushed back to pick up my son, followed by quick grocery shopping before starting to cook at home (not to mention that each day I had to remove layers of dust which found their way outside of the bathroom within seconds, even in the last corner of the living room we found it.

I am happy that it’s weekend (even if the bathroom isn’t ready as promised) but at least there is time to re-charge.

And while I’m sitting here this question popped up in my mind – who am I?

This week I was only a mom and an employee, barely a wife and just me was almost invisible.

There are seldom days where I’m just me because with a toddler you are a 24/7 mom, but that’s fine, I like it (most of the times) and I wanted exactly this.

I’m a wife too and the combination of me, mom and wife is really great, just recently I have the feeling as if the employee is taking far too much time and I’m hardly able to be the rest.

I am also a yogi, if I’m lucky for half an hour per day, sometimes less and sometimes more.

Whom I’m missing recently are the artist, the jewelry maker, the relaxed and the shopping me, they are hiding themselves somewhere and I need to dig hard to find them I think, but I know that they are there.

Also the reading one seems to got lost along the way, I try so hard but after a few sentences I cannot keep my eyes open on most of the days.

I know that these times change and I know that it is all worth it in the end. I just have to look into the eyes of my son to know that this overflowing pure love is the greatest gift in life, everything else is a plus, an extra, something I will have time for when he’s older.

I also lost some mes along the way and that’s great, I’m happy that I’m not them anymore. That doesn’t mean I didn’t like them, they were wonderful the way they were, they are just not important any more and their time is over. There was the single and the undecided twen, the partying and the what cost’s the world one, the newly hired and the where do I wanna be in 20 years one, the blindly in love and the sad and depressed one, I look back and say thanks to all of them, you made me the person I am today and I won’t miss anyone of you.

Who are you right now? And are you happy with the others vanishing or hiding? Who won’t show up again?

Questions over questions, I’d love to read your stories.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Crazy days of motherhood

Crazy days of motherhood

Crazy days of motherhood

Life ain’t always easy…

After a working day, without the still breastfed toddler at home, I thought I pick him up in the kindergarten and quickly jump into the supermarket to buy a few things.

Bad bad bad idea, that was the worst idea I ever had.

I think there is a breastfeeding brain which is similar to the pregnancy dementia.

What happened?
I’m sitting just now in the back of our car, toddler is drinking half asleep from a breast the size of a giant melon.
I was barely able to focus on what I wanted to buy, forgot the soup but didn’t care because the main goal was to get somehow back to the car without fainting or crying or both because of the milk overproduction.

When I went into the supermarket I thought all is fine until all of a sudden this insanely pain was hitting me and the mean part is, without warning, in waves, just as if it wants to pinch me once in a while to tell me there are more important things than food for mom – food for the toddler is ready.

Whoever said breastfeeding is all snuggling and lovely and precious and nice (which it of course is very often) forgot that it can be painful and raw like this as well.
As soon as he latched I felt the first small relief, after 5 minutes I felt already better and not scared anymore.
If you are alone with your child in a big store and feel so crappy it is scary, isn’t it?
For me thoughts run weird and uncontrolled through my mind. It’s similar to a panick attack which is hitting you out of the blue without upfront warning.
What if I would faint?

Would I fall in a direction, onto my child or just collapse – why did I put him in the carrier – he’s in danger if I faint – is my husband at work answering the phone if someone would call him now – what was that stabbing sensation in my left breast – who’s taking care of my son – or was it from the heart – how should he get up to here when I have the car – calm down, you won’t faint, it’s just too much milk – he will be completely scared if mommy isn’t there – get out here as fast as you can – now it seems to be better – no, the pain comes in waves – do I leave or grab some more milk, better go, right?

This is a thought-circle which I cannot stop at that moment although I know very well that instead of calming down it’s pushing me more into the panicking corner.
Am I the only one who has these thoughts?

We start to relax now, the fear subsides and life comes back, how glad I am today for this car. Sitting here is like a shelter, it’s our little place to securely and safe with locked doors get back to a normal state. I wrote in another post about our messy car but in exactly this moment I’m so thankful that we have everything inside that car – a blanket to cover my little boy who’s really sleepy now, a bottle of water for me to drink something while feeding him, I could even charge my phone if I want to but right now we are fine.

Who needs soup?

I put the sleeping precious milk vampire into his car seat, cover him with his elephant blanket, check my shirt if all is covered again before I leave the backseat and start the engine to drive us home.

Thanks for these days because sometimes I need exactly that to realize how blessed we are and how happy I can be that we have all these possibilities.

What’s one of your crazy motherhood experiences?

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Daily Mindfulness is so easy

Daily Mindfulness is so easy

Daily Mindfulness

Seriously, we often forget how easily we can have small time-outs because we are too stressed to realize.

Life is not that complicated, we make it complicated.

Are you showering? What question is that you may ask now.

Did you ever try to shut down your thoughts while being in the shower and started to be aware of the moment?

Raise your awareness instead of thinking about what to do next. Listen to the sound of the water, smell the soap, really smell it. Watch the water and follow it’s path, one drop against the tile, it’s slowly running down and ends up in the puddle your’re standing in. Realize how your hair becomes softer when it’s getting wet, see the chicken pox on your arm when you turn the water off. This shower experiences is like a little spa visit for free. You will feel better afterwards than before if you give yourself these little brain time-outs.

Another daily mindfulness idea is going for a walk. You don’t have to walk an hour if you don’t like walking because it’s not really about the walking itself, it’s more about the whole experience. You step outside and actively feel and see and smell where you are.

What sound does it make when you walk, are your shoes making a sound or the surface you are walking on and how does it change when you step on another surface from tar to grass for instance. What are you doing with your arms, are they swinging, are you walking with your hands in your pockets? Is your breathing different? Listen to your breath, try to calm it down while you are walking and inhale deeply, how does it feel?

Do you see the little birds along the way or the trees which are loosing all leaves right now? There are so many little things we don’t see when we daily rush by and it’s beautiful to realize them one after the other.

So, and for how long were you walking now, because the best thing is that you start to loose track of time and all of a sudden you were walking much longer than anticipated. These are the precious moment which energize you and give you the power to go through the really stressful times for example at work.

I have lots of other examples but will end up with giving you my favorite third one.

Lay down – yeah, that’s a great one, isn’t it?

If you read my blog for a while you know that I love Yoga and when I say “lay down” I mean laying down in a yoga way.

One wonderful asana (yoga pose) to relax is Supta Baddha Konasana or the reclined bound angle:

images

Actually my aim was to show you a picture of me in one of my favorite relaxing positions but try to make some yoga pictures when your toddler in running around you.

The result was the following:

© by misssfaith2017 (10)

That’s life with children and it’s so worth it!

You’ll find millions of pictures on the web but this moment will last a lifetime.

Back to the relaxation pose – besides this reclined bound angle there are several other Yoga poses which are not complicated at all but give you instantly a time out and also time to focus on something completely different.

Child’s Pose is one, it relieves back pain and when you lay your forehead on the floor you will have new sensations I assume you never did since a while – did you smell the floor? I like our wooden floor as it has a wonderful smell which I only can realize when I am like that on the floor.. Outside in the grass is great as well, when the grass is tickling your nose and you close your eyes and just feel the earth below you.

If it comes to relaxing yoga poses I could go ahead for a while I assume, but the essence is that you do what feels good for you and that you just start to open your mind to what surrounds you at that very moment.

It’s indeed much easier than we think as life is not that complicated, it’s all about feeling, tasting, smelling, being, living – mindful moments are present every second of our life, we just have to raise our awareness to appreciate them instead of rushing through our life as if we are hunted. We aren’t, we are here to live this life we have.

What are your mindful moments? What do you like to do to feel yourself again?

I would be happy to know your thoughts.

Take care!

 

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Wintertime – Oh how I missed you

Wintertime – Oh how I missed you

Wintertime

The winter time is really close now and if you don’t want to stay inside for the next months to come here are a few ideas on what you can do outside.

Living with a toddler means for me fresh air is a MUST. Children need to be outside and explore the world no matter if it’s snowing or raining – properly dressed every weather is good weather and that counts for us adults as well.

1.

We live in Munich and instead of walking the known ways around our home it’s fun to explore new ways. Step out and turn left instead of right, cross a road you never crossed before and see what’s on the other side. Thanks to smartphones we won’t get lost, don’t worry.

You will see “your” city from a whole new perspective.

2.

A walk in the park.

Parks are wonderful places for each season of the year. The autumn is almost over and you will barely find chestnuts by now but wait for the first snow, the park will look completely different again when it’s covered in snow.

Besides that, if you have children, parks are great to let your children run without being scared they end up on the street. The air in parks is better as well so deep breathing while walking will give you a whole new energy.

3.

Wellness in Winter

We can’t wait for the real dark and cold days because what we love to do once in a while is drive to a spa.

Steam bath, outside swimming are with hot water, sauna, oriental hammam, wrapped in flushy bath robes life is great. The last time we went was when I was pregnant so it’s really time to do that again. This time our little son will join and there are wonderful spas with kids areas as well.

4.

Christmas markets

My husband can’t wait for them to start just for the simple reason that he loves the bavarian “Reiberdatschi” which is grated potatoe fried in oil and served with applesauce or creme fraiche.

Christmas Markets are wonderful, they are lovely lighted up and you smell something else in every corner. Handmade soaps are sold as christmas presents, spices to bake are available, everything looks warm and cozy even if it’s deepest winter.

5.

Go into the nature

Forests as well as lakes are great destinations in winter. The snowy frozen forest smells so fresh, I literally would love to bottle up that air and take it home with me. Maybe you can take a slide if you are with children, they love to sit there covered in blankets when they are tired of walking.

Lakes have also a very special atmosphere in winter. They often look a bit foggy and mysterious. If they are really really small or if it’s really really cold you may be lucky to find one where you can walk on. The sound of the cracking ice is a wonderful sound as it often echoes over the lake (just make 100% sure that it’s allowed and secure – if not stay on the shore!).

 

I’m sure there are lots of things which can be done in winter, these are my five highlights and I can’t wait to enter the real winter time just to do all of the above.

 

What do you love most in winter – what could you recommend?

I’m happy to get more tips.

Take care and stay warm!

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Daily habits of gratitude

Daily habits of gratitude

The year is ending and it’s time to recap (as each year) – what was good, what was bad, what could have been better and how. People tend to start thinking about their life when days are shorter and the dark time is longer, they become even slightly depressive and make big plans on new years resolutions not to be in the same misery at the end of the coming year but is it helping?

Are new years resolutions worth the time at all? I don’t think so.

Most people I know started happily into the new year, proud that they managed 5 days in a row not to eat meat for instance. And then?

Latest in February everything is over and on thanksgiving the turkey is filled even with bacon and they start to dwell about what they have to change for the year to come.

A vicious circle, isn’t it?

I don’t like resolutions at all, I don’t like to promise myself that I do something over and over again just because it may sound good as a Facebook post and probably will bring me a hand full of likes and loves and shares.

What I like is to do something because I want to do it from the bottom of my soul, something which won’t let me down if I miss one day or two. Something which adapts to my way of living while changing my way of living.

Gratitude – gratitude is so easy if we open our minds and it will change your mood instantly, I promise!

Thinking about something you are grateful for is an easy task which directly guides your thoughts into a positive way of thinking. I don’t know someone who is grateful for the spilled coffee in the morning. But I assure you that you will be in a good mood when thinking about the colleague who was so kind helping you cleaning the floor where you spilled your coffee and the nice chat you had while doing so.

Your day won’t be over when you miss one day of thinking about grateful moments, it still will be a normal day, you won’t feel bad because if you would you directly start to think about something positive again. You see, it’s another vicious circle, this time a very positive one.

Do we need big life changers? I don’t think so. What we need is a level of awareness.

We are here now, this very moment is a moment to be grateful for. I’m sitting and writing while my son sleeps and life is calm and quiet. I don’t hear bad news and I don’t feel cold or sick. I try to motivate people with what I’m writing and that’s good. This is a simple moment, nothing fancy and exciting, BUT it is a moment I’m grateful for, right here, right now.

I hope you see the point I try to make and I hope you have days full of these grateful moments because what we need in life is a series of good times plus the willingness to see the good which is coming after the bad (yes, bad moments happen, I cannot deny that). The art of living is to turn everything into something you can be grateful for.

That’s not easy, indeed not, but it is so damn worth it, believe me.

Instead of crying start to smile, instead of shouting start to whisper, give it a serious try and you will see, it works. Not always, that’s for sure and good, only if we experience the crying and shouting we know why we should smile and whisper.

I try to wrap it up and I don’t find a proper sentence – this is my imperfect life just now just here and I love it.

Share these thoughts if you like, it would make me happy and would give me another grateful moment – if you don’t want that’s good as well because my life is not depending on one moment, it depends on a series of moments as does yours.

Take care and be grateful.

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Toddler on the road or what’s the essence of life


Do you know these families who have a certain area around their home for the first years after a child was born?
"Aurora needs her nap time in her bed."
"Lucas is not sleeping anywhere else."
Or worse, the parents who need the whole children equipment from bottle warmer to rocking chair, the ones who are not able to improvise and stick to their patterns.
We are not like that, neither our child nor we.
We love to travel and the easiest for me ist to travel by car.
You throw all you need inside and off we go.
We spent already lots of time in the car so it's a bit like a second home.
If you don't expect it you'll find a diaper (often when you indeed need it) or jacket which we thought lost.
Yes, it's a bit messy and I admit that we are at the end of October and we still have the beach umbrella in the back and Tuscan sand on the floor, that's us and I love it!
The best of these messy details is that they don't matter, what matters is that we have a big radius around home already and that we know we can go in whatever direction and we are happy.
A travelling toddler who sleeps everywhere is worth the mess.
His seat is based on cookie crumbs and our family is based everywhere.
He sleeps apparently everywhere when he is tired. What he needs is the reassurance that we are around and that he is safe with us.
Everything else doesn't matter, it can be loud or quiet, sunny or dark, crowded or peaceful, when he is tired he grabs our hand or hugs us tight and off to the land of toddlerdreams.
But what about sleeping times and nap times?
We don't have them.
And before someone starts to argue how important steadiness is…we love that we don't have them!
He is 18 months old, he sleeps when he's tired, he eats when he's hungry and we give him the freedom to grow without a strict schedule as much as we can.
Latest with 6 years when he starts school this life is over as he cannot go to school when he likes or stays in bed longer in the morning when he's supposed to be in his class.
What are 6 years compared to a lifetime?
We should cherish these first six years where our kids are mainly free little birds.
The kindergarten (Kita) for kids under three started for us in September and he's doing it great.
He has a nap time there and he's actually napping and he eats when they all eat.
Children are able to adapt quickly and they know which rules apply where so why should we limit his freedom at home?
We are now on our way to my parents and he sleeps in his car seat next to me while I'm writing and my husband drives, this is our on the road life, one glance at it.
Most people tend to make life more complicated than it is. What is really important, especially with children?
Now! Now is all we should focus on. Our children could be our teacher because they know how it works by heart.
BE HERE NOW (look at your child and soak in the love).
At the end of the day WE are important, the core of our beings.
Our travelling toddler is happy, and so are we ♥️ that's the essence of life, isn't it?

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Are there still real blogs or is everyone sponsored?

Are there still real blogs or is everyone sponsored?

Real Blog

I would lie if I wouldn’t think about sponsored blog posts, it’s nice if you get something for your work, isn’t it?

I mean, honestly, I write because I love to write and I publish my writing because?

Because I would love to start discussions, receive some feedback, connect with others BUT this won’t happen. It’s not happening because this tiny blog here is my hobby.

I’m not professional when it comes to setting up a blog because I have no time for it – I’m a mom, a full-time worker, a wife, a woman, I cannot be as professional as someone who works in that area.

But what I am, and this is something I can ensure, I am real.

So what? I am happy and thankful for the few readers I have and my eyes light up whenever I receive a comment on one of my posts because it’s something special.

I may not be perfect but who is?

What I wonder about indeed is this whole influencer story. What means influencer? I try to influence my readers, followers, friends, family, correct?

Do I want to influence or rather be someone who is showing reality?

This feeling that everyone recently is sooooooo excited and soooooooo in love with each and every new item is something I don’t believe.

Many influencers are sitting in their stylish clean designer house, they drive the newest car and have the happiest marriage, their kids are little dressed up mannequins and life is perfect. That’s what they show us.

But is that what we want to see? Really?

Where are the messy moms who barely are able to shower once per day because either a cranky kid is hanging on her leg or she is just too tired in the evening after a day full of work, grocery shopping, cleaning, cooking, kids and who prefer to spend an hour sitting on the floor building wooden castles instead of blow drying their hair for the perfect look?

Where are the wives with not so perfect marriages, the women who would love to wipe a shiny floor again for a YouTube video but who struggle to walk through the house without stepping on toys.

Where are all of you?

Don’t tell me I’m the only one with a messy life, the only one who dreams of a spa weekend (or better week) but who would miss her kids and her husband too much to leave them behind?

I think I knocked myself latest with this post out of the influencer circle unless there is someone out there who wants an authentic opinion.

I like that yogurt because I really like it or I don’t like the yogurt because it sucks. I can explain both scenarios, don’t worry, but I would not tell you it’s so delicious that I recommend it to everyone out there. Maybe you want a messy mom, then this here is my application.

A blog with a handful of real readers, a twitter account that is linked to everything I post but where I have no idea if someone indeed read something there, an Instagram account which I absolutely love and which has quite a decent number of followers but the majority of them is either sleeping 24/7 or lost their phones as interaction is rarely, ah, and my Facebook account, I love facebook but also there the interaction mainly takes place in secret mommy groups instead of public on my profile.

I can recommend everything I like and I indeed do and maybe even be able to influence, but I cannot sell a fridge to a penguin and I don’t want to do that either.

Are you real or are you sponsored?

#thisisNOTasponsoredpost 😉