Writing – passion or possession?

And what about my day job…

Since I joined wordpress and imported everything I wrote before, this page is getting me back to what I thought blogging is in first place.
Even more to be honest, it’s really the best platform for me to do what I want to do around my blog.
And here it starts, now that I get more and more into it I want to spend more time with my writing passion – the problem is that I have a day job which consumes lots of my time and sometimes doesn’t leave much for enjoying my writing.
What’s dragging me to the blog – several reasons if I listen carefully to my heart.
It’s not only that I love to write and to pin all ideas down, it’s also kind of thrilling when I see likes coming in or persons start to follow.
Follow me!
Who am I that persons click the follow button?
Is it really interesting what I do on this blog or is it just me, thinking that I may improve now in writing?
Are they following because it’s a bad example on “how not to start a blog” or do they understand what I mean?
If I would write now that it is for sure that I am good and that’s the reason for people following me, the great thinker and writer, it would be insane.
I really think sometimes I’m getting insane, but vice versa.
From the bottom of my heart I believe that I’m not the dumbest person alive, I was always interested in many things with a certain kind of intelligence to understand them properly. Literature is accompanying me since I read the first word. A life without books is impossible for me, it’s like the air we need to breathe.
But there are times when I start feeling insecure. Am I really good enough? There are so many blogs, why should mine be the one dragging people to it?
Isn’t my layout too easy, shouldn’t there be more features included, but in the end I find back to myself and back to the reason why I have started.
I want to write, purely and simply write. So why to have the most stylish layout if the main focus should lay on what I write?
To be honest, I don’t want to spend hours on trying a light green background with purple dots or a sidebar with pop ups and polls as I see more purpose in using the time to write new posts.
Yet it is another kind of life story what I’m doing here. My life story, sometimes mixed with fiction, sometimes pure reality, and sometimes just things I love and adore.
But if I see how I am, then it’s not yet another life story as I’m the kind of person who loves to listen or read from someone else’s life. Not because I’m a stalker or jealous on how others go along, no, just because I think that each life is unique and each story can fulfill needs.
What needs?
There are the ones, which can amuse us, or make us cry, the ones that raise awareness and let us realize that we should be thankful for what we have, the ones which are similar to ours and which may show us another way when we feel to be on the one way road. And still there are so many stories out there which should be written but can’t as not everyone is in the wonderful position of being able to write, read or having a computer and electricity.
I hope you see the point, this is why I am writing.
I wouldn’t call it a possession although I realize since I’m here that life is so much more than working – where is my way, is it really to work through the day and write through the night?
Is my passion to have a lack of sleep because I need both?
I think I’m on my way and this is indeed something good already. I’m curious to see where this way will lead to but it would be far too early to know now. Another story which still needs to be written, one day, when I may found out the purpose of this passion possession.
What was your first intention when you started to blog?

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